Call Me Daddy
by ezontheI
Summary: How to go from bachelor to father in the midst of oral sex with Stefan Salvatore. He could use a little help. AH/AU Rated M for a reason. S/E, K/C, D/B.
1. I'm Your Dad!

**This is my first fanfic with the intent of being pretty long. Don't expect updates to be constant until RWY is finished. Do, however, expect pretty long chapters. This is probably the Stefan I love most that I've written and I hope you guys like him too! This is a little more racier, Stefan's a bit more of a douche, but I just ask that you trust me and keep a little patience. You will love him later.**

Prologue

The drinks begin to flow, and I'm taking shots like they're water.

"Get me two beers," Nik orders a waitress with a cheeky grin. He eyes her chest and she gives me a wink, and then him. I appraise her for a moment and lick my lips in appreciation.

"Actually, make that four!"

"You're already fucking hammered, you need more?"

"My brother, it's a _celebration_. That's what you told me, at least. And you and I both know it isn't truly a celebration unless your cock is being sucked and you're wasted."

He laughs loudly and shakes his head, "I'll second that." The waitress shimmies back over and hands us our drinks. "Cheers then, you old fuck."

"I'm 26, back off."

We sit in silence for a moment, sipping our beers and eying the room with pure hunger. Nik nods at a few scantily-clad girls that pass by, giving them his signature grin. Our nights to go out were becoming more and more rare, but I considered this a top priority. It was also my birthday, and why wouldn't I want to spend my birthday with my best friend?

"That girl over there could bring me to my knees," he says with a smirk, bringing me out of my thoughts. He motions to a blonde in the corner who's shaking her ass like it's on fire. She catches my eye and gives me a little coy grin before turning and laughing with her friends. I smile and bring the beer to my lips.

"She seems like a winner for the night," I say with a lick of my lips. I finish the remaining drops of beer and slam it onto the table.

Bodies move and grind to the music, the whole club practically thumping. While I don't dance—at all— I do appreciate watching girls like the one ahead of me do it. I glide over and give her a smile that no one can resist.

"Do you want to dance?" Such a typical opener.

"No," I say honestly.

Skipping the dirty details, we make it outside the club, laughing at how tipsy we both are. She smiles seductively at me and then pushes me against the wall. "You," she starts, gyrating her hips against mine, immediately getting me hard, "are really hot." She giggles and I bury my face in her neck.

Her hands travel across my chest, scraping before she attaches her lips to mine. She tastes like...fruity drink and mint, which isn't bad at all. I kiss her back with equal fervor, running my hands up and down her back before cupping her ass in my hands. She lets out a little moan and I bite down a little on her lip.

Without any coercing at all, she willingly reaches for the button to my jeans. I give a look around, still sober enough to know I didn't want any perverts getting a free show, and put my hands in her hair. She runs her hand over my dick, giving a squeeze and bites down on her lip.

"Is this okay?" She asks me. I try not to smirk. I nod at her and she falls to her knees in front of me.

She pulls my cock out from it's confines and right before she puts her lips around me, my fucking phone rings.

_Great._

If it's Nik, I'm going to murder his ass.

"Baby, hold on a second." I awkwardly reach down to my jeans and pull my phone out, trying not to answer angrily.

Which is hard to do, you know? I'm sexually frustrated.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this Stefan Salvatore?"

I furrow my eyebrows and bite on my lip. "Who's this?"

"This is Stacy from Child Services. Is this Mr. Stefan Salvatore?"

And I already fucking know. Just because I have the worst luck in the world, I can basically taste the next words on her mouth.

So I've got this girl on her knees in front of me who gets up, because she's pissed I'm not paying any attention to her, and then I've got another girl on the phone with me trying to tell me something I know isn't true, and I'm still hard as a fucking rock.

And it's my birthday.

"Yes," I breathe, closing my eyes.

"Okay, well—"

"I don't have any fucking kids."

The woman's tone changes and she practically snarls the next few words at me.

"Be at our offices at twelve tomorrow, Mr. Salvatore."

Couldn't she have said please?

* * *

Chapter 1: I'm Your Dad!

"It's the most ridiculous bullshit I've ever heard."

"You wear a condom, don't you?" Matt says, poking his hands in my chip bag. I shake my head.

"Every time."

"Well, take a paternity test."

"I am."

"But," Bonnie says in a patronizing tone, "what if it's yours." She lets her black hair fall over her shoulder in waves as she gives me that little smile; it's the smile that says _you're fucked_.

I glare at her. "It's not. Aren't you supposed to be on my side? You're supposed to be my friend."

"Exactly. I'm looking out for you. This could potentially be yours." She said it with a laugh that displayed just how much she was enjoying this.

"It's not," I snarl, defiantly.

"It could be."

"But it's not, Bennett."

"But it could be, and what if it is?"

What if it is? I'd fucking be a dad then. I'd have to man up, I guess. I wasn't putting it up for adoption and abandoning it. If it was mine, then I'd own up to it. I wouldn't do what my dad did to me.

But it isn't mine.

I'm _so _particular about those things. I always wrap it up; there are no exceptions. I wasn't as promiscuous as my friends made me out to be, but when I was I made sure I was safe. I'd maybe fuck a girl every two weeks? If that. And it wasn't like I _used _them. They never really thought it was going anywhere either. I never picked up a girl from the library or something and made her swoon or anything. I was always clear about my intentions.

"When do you have to be out there?"

"She said twelve. Fuck, I don't even want to go."

"If you know it's not yours, then just go," Matt says simply, eating his sandwich hungrily. I glared at him too, and he shrugged, a piece of lettuce falling from his mouth.

I shake my head, "I'm wasting _hours_ going to this little shit meeting or whatever. I need the money," I tell him with a sigh.

"You've never even used a sick day."

"That's because—like I said—I need the money. This shit hole barely pays enough to pay my rent and phone bill."

They nod in understanding and Bonnie leans toward the clock. "It's going on 11:30."

This is such bullshit.

"Thank you for coming, Mr. Salvatore." I nod and look around the place.

"We have your daughters things, you can pick her up to—"

"She isn't my daughter."

The woman in front of me's face turned to steel and she gave a tight lipped smile. "Mr. Salvatore, I assure you she is yours."

"How old is she?"

"One month."

"Only one fucking month?"

"Watch your mouth," she regards, messing around with some papers. "Her birth certificate clearly states that you are her father."

"Yeah, that's believable."

"If you're asking for a paternity test, then be my guest." I lean back with a satisfied smirk. "But there's a little girl in a home right now, being passed around random people and will continue to do so until her dad picks her up. So I ask you to have a little respect for her mother who passed away, and take up on your responsibility."

A little shocked at the death of her mom and at how easily she made me feel like an ass, I scratch at my jaw. "What's her mom's name?"

"Lexi Smith."

Lexi? Of course.

I'd been wanting to fuck Lexi since last year when I met her at Nik's birthday party. After months of endless teasing, she gave in to me...right around the time this baby would've been conceived. Suddenly, I didn't feel as confident as when I first walked in.

"How did she...you know."

"Die?"

"Yeah," I mutter, kind of sadly because Lexi was a cool girl. I was sort of upset when she didn't keep in touch.

"Car accident."

"Got you," I say with a nod. "She doesn't have any other relatives?"

"No, Mr. Salvatore, none that were very happy with her, at least."

I sit for a moment, staring at Stacy and her staring back at me with small blue eyes. She glares at me for a couple seconds and then doesn't for the next and I wonder if she's crazy or if I am.

"Well, do I just go get her?"

"Yes, and we'll perform a paternity test."

"Can I get her tomorrow?"

She doesn't seem to pleased with the answer but nods anyway, "You can."

* * *

I don't even know about babies.

I don't know how to hold them, or what they eat, or what they like, or how to take care of one or anything. At all.

I press a little harder on the pedal and adjust the car seat next to me with my left hand. Babies couldn't sit in the front of the car, could they? I didn't fucking think so, either.

My little car accelerates and I let out another breath. Just fuck my life. What was this little girls name anyway? I guess I need to pick up some baby food too? The only thing I had at my house was pizza rolls and alcohol.

When I reach the little building, my stomach turns into knots. I'm not _nervous _to meet this baby. It's just a baby; it probably doesn't even know what's going on right now. Let's face it, in twenty years she won't remember half this shit anyway.

Good thing, too.

It was an adoption center, and why they kept her here was beyond me. I didn't like it. Several kids peered up at me longingly and my chest pounded a little harder. _I used to be one of those kids. _I used to wait, and wait, for some asshole to come and pick me up, even if it were just for a night. I hated that place.

I felt for these kids. I gave them my least creepy smile and opened up the doors to the building.

God, it smelt bad.

A woman approached me with a happy smile. "I'm Rebekah, how can I help you today?"

I awkwardly tug at my hair, unsure how to deal with any of this. "I'm Stefan Salvatore."

Her eyes light up and she nearly squeals. "I could just tell! You look just like little Nellie!"

_Nellie? _Huh.

It wasn't that bad.

I decide against getting defensive and denying the baby as mine, and instead just give her a shaky smile. She grins at me and hands me some papers. "You need to sign these, and then we'll go wake her up from her nap. Such an adorable little thing."

"Is she?" I blandly ask, scribbling my signature on random papers. Rebekah feeds right into my attention and goes on and on about the baby, smiling and gesturing about what she looks like whenever she eats.

"She loves banana. Adores it, actually. Do you?"

"Yeah," I say offhandedly, "banana is okay."

Then I start shaking a little and tap my foot. I hand her back the papers and let out a gust of air. She eyes my expression and continues on. "She's so adorable, you're going to love her. I'm so sorry about her mother," she says honestly.

I feel like I'm going to have a heart attack and she just keeps _talking_. I don't know if I'm ready to take this thing home with me.

"We've had couples come in and see her and they just love her."

"She's not on the market," I kind of gasp, and she gives me a weary look.

"Mr. Salvatore, are you okay?" She asks me, but she sends one of the aids to get Nellie anyway. I look at her and shake my head.

"Can I get a glass of water?" She smiles a knowing smile and then rushes off toward the little kitchen. When she returns, I take the glass and practically chug it down.

"Is it coming?"

"Nellie, Mr. Salvatore?"

"Yeah, Nellie."

"They're probably just grabbing her things," she says, watching me in amusement.

Then the aid rounds the corner with a grin, cooing at a little pink bundle in her arms. My breath catches and I bite down on my lip over and over again. Why am I acting like this?

_Maybe it's because you know this child is yours, and you're going to be a dad._

The aid walks closer and I blink my eyes tightly. "Here's your daddy, Nellie." She motions for me to hold out my hands, and I awkwardly do a cradle with my arms that Rebekah quickly adjusts.

The aid carefully puts her arms in mine, and then I'm holding a baby.

I'm holding my baby.

This baby was fucking mine.

Not because she _looked _like me. She was only one month old, you couldn't tell who she looked like.

I could just feel that this baby was mine.

She peers up at me with blue eyes and her tiny mouth and nose scrunch up and then she mashes her little lips together. She must smell this place too.

Thank fuck she didn't cry. Instead, she nuzzled into her soft pink blanket with a contented sigh.

Words kind of fail me, so I just grab the baby bag from the aid and put it on my shoulder, still holding the baby. Rebekah watches with a silent happiness and I give her my thanks as I walk stoically out of the building.

I ignore the kids watching me because I know what they're thinking. _Of course he picked the baby. They always pick the babies._

I keep her cradled in one arm and carefully open up the passenger door. I put her in the little car seat and bite on my lip. I adjust the straps and make sure everything's all locked and shit before I get in on the driver's side.

Soon, we're both in the car, and it's quiet. I look at her and notice how tiny she is.

"Alright Mini," I try the name out on my tongue, "I'm going to drive really slow."

She looks up at me curiously and mashes her lips together again. "I don't know how to f-," I pause, "do this, so just tell me if you aren't comfortable."

Nothing.

She rolls her head to the side and sighs.

Fuck my life.

"When we get home, I'm gonna have to go find you a crib. I didn't actually think you were, you know, real."

I start up the car and she gives me a little look before rolling her head to the other side. I shake my head and start my drive home. Nik and Bonnie called but I wasn't going to drive and talk on the phone with Nellie in the car with me.

I still should call my parents and my brother, but I decide to hold that hell off for another time. I knew exactly what their reactions would be. Damon was always the more favorable one, who could do zero wrong. While we were close, I couldn't help but be distanced from my 'parents'. I just don't think I was family to them. I think I was a moral obligation.

When we make it home, I cringe at my little apartment. A moving truck its outside, and a woman with brown hair is talking to the driver , gesturing wildly with her hands. A man next to her puts a calming hand on her shoulder and she shrugs him off. I couldn't see her face, but she had a nice ass. I could feel Nellie looking at me watching them.

"This is going to take a lot of getting used to," I tell her honestly.

I ignore the looks of my neighbors and grumble my way upstairs to my apartment, which is just as dingy as the outside.

"This is home," I say, dropping her bag on the floor. Mini looks up at me like she doesn't understand what I'm saying and scrunches her nose up again. "It doesn't stink," I say.

I look around at the empty beer bottles and pizza cartons. My house wasn't completely baby proof, but Bonnie was working on it, I guess.

"Are you tired, Mini?" She looks at me again. "Are you hungry? Bonnie left you some mashed peaches and diapers." I keep her in her carrier that was a gift from Matt, and put it on the couch.

"You're going to have to stay in that thing until I clean up."

Why am I talking to a baby?

I inspect the gifts from my friends: food, a shirt that said 'daddy's girl' two packs of diapers, a pacifier, and some more toys, I guess. I wasn't going to complain, because how I was going to afford this stuff regularly was beyond me.

I leave my keys on the table and decide to dress down. I pull off my shirt on my way to my room and before I can get my pants off, I hear the most awful noise ever.

She's fucking crying.

She's basically heaving over, her little mouth open so wide and her eyes squished into nothing. She screams and screams, and if I didn't know any better, I would think she was dying.

"Mini, please be quiet." She continues to scream. "Nellie, please."

She cries and cries and whimpers and so I reach for the bag of baby stuff. I grab at the pacifier and wonder if I should wash it first.

I look at her and then at the sink.

Probably.

I jog to the sink and hurriedly run the pacifier under the water for a couple of seconds. Do I just...put it in her mouth? I don't want to force her.

She cries harder.

Fuck it. I slowly ease it into her mouth, and it was like I pulled the cord on her or something. She immediately stops and garbles a little around the magic piece of plastic.

Not bothering to put on a shirt, I open up my lap top.

I needed to do a little research.

**What do you think? I'm going to start writing chapter 2 soon! Also, I am looking for a beta because none of my stories are, and I think they could be much better if they were. So if anyone's interested, just PM me! Thanks!**


	2. Hold My Child

**I'm really glad some of you are on for the ride! Thanks for reviewing, it makes me want to write! Xo**

Chapter: Hold My Child

Mini was a handful and a half.

The paternity tests came back, but I didn't have to look at them to know this baby was mine. I scanned over them, but after all the time I spent with Nellie, I couldn't find it to be angry or disappointed. The little thing had grown on me.

Apparently I get benefits from the adoption center, Lexi's social security, etc. It helped me out a ton. I could afford the diapers, formula stuff, and even this cool carry on thing that held her close to my stomach and I could still be arms free. I haven't gotten her a crib yet, but she'd taken nicely to the corner of my arm pretty well. Still, I'd have to get on that shit. When she wasn't crying, or spitting up peaches all over me, she was actually a chill baby. However, she was crying and spitting up a great majority of the time.

"Nellie, please." It seemed to be a mantra for the two of us. She was almost two months old, and I'd been looking a lot online about what to expect when the baby turns that age.

She makes noises now, which was pretty amazing and annoying all at once. All she did was 'ah' and 'dooo', but she did it so often. I could tell she was going to be a talker.

The most amazing thing I was looking forward to in her two month growth was finally getting her to smile. I tried to make funny faces but she just got scared, so I stopped.

When my Mini finally took down her food, I decided I should check the mail. Mini and I spent our Saturdays at the park, usually. My work schedule had been hectic before, but with the income from Mini I was able to cut back a few hours and spend some quality time with my little girl.

I still haven't told my parents.

It's probably a shitty thing to do, but they could hold off for a while.

I make my way down the staircase, bumping Nellie in my arms, trying not to coo at her in public. If I didn't have to take care of Nellie, I'd be getting laid every night. You can't imagine the things that women want to do to single fathers. It's sick.

I'm not sure what a DILF is, but these teenaged girls at the mall whispered it to each other. I have to remember to look that up.

When I make it to the mailboxes, the girl with the nice ass was there. I'd seen her (and her ass) a lot more now that she moved in the apartment above me. I never talked to her, or looked at her, because every time I saw her she was yelling at someone. She had a really pretty voice, if that even makes sense, so sometimes I eavesdropped on bits and pieces of her conversation. Usually, talking to a girl wouldn't bother me, but something about her was extremely intimidating.

So I choose this moment to dawdle around the mailbox, patiently waiting for the woman to move. For some reason, this chick likes to read her mail at the mailbox.

_Can't she see some people want to avoid her?_

I quietly wait, and check out her ass for a few more moments until Mini opens her big mouth.

"Adoooo," she mumbles unintelligibly. Fuck my life. Then the girl turns around, and I see her face. That's actually a lie; the first thing I see is her eyes. They were the most expressive ones I'd ever seen.

I mean, usually I go for the more exotic eyes, you know? Brown is known as being so typical, and boring. But these eyes, for some reason, were anything but. Then I looked at her lips, which were really kissable and red, but also really distracting. I could see myself looking at her lips for hours, which was a really big problem.

I'd seen plenty of attractive women before, and she wasn't the hottest thing I'd ever seen, she was just _different_. In a really, really, good way.

She stares at me for a moment, then she raises an eyebrow and I think my balls shrink into nothing. Like I said, this girl really freaks me out a bit. She's always screaming. I think she's kind of pissed I was openly checking her out, but then she sees my Mini and it's like she's viewing the Holy Grail. Her eyes light up and her mouth opens in this playful baby grin that probably only she can actually pull off. Then, she reaches over and puts her finger in front of Mini's mouth, and wiggles it around. Mini watches it and makes all sorts of little noises she never made for me.

I want to snap at her, because who the hell just plays with people's babies? Is that even normal? Then I think that Nellie might be the only reason that I get out of this place alive, so I just let her.

The Nice Eyed ( I'm not being crass today) Girl looks at me and doesn't smile or anything. "How old is she?"

My tongue feels really heavy but I just look down at Nellie and try to man up. "Almost two months."

She smiles, nods and then laughs when Nellie almost reaches for her finger, but then pouts when her arm can't move like her little hands.

"What's her name?"

"Stefan."

She pauses and gives me a dubious look. "You named your daughter Stefan?"

I try not to look embarrassed and look down at Nellie again. What the hell is wrong with me? "Her name is uh...Nellie. I thought you meant...my name is Stefan."

I thought she'd be pissed, but for the first time she laughs at _me_. Not in a rude way, but in a comforting way. "I'm Elena," she shares kind of quietly. Hm. Elena.

She has a weird confidence in her tone. Even when she's speaking softly, she's really authoritative. I've decided I'm both scared and, oddly enough, turned on.

"She's adorable."

"Just like her daddy," I say surprisingly. I haven't really referred to myself as Nellie's dad before, but this odd surge of pride fills me. I cockily puff out my chest a bit and Elena rolls her eyes at me and continues going ballistic over Mini.

It was starting to get awkward because I hadn't gotten my mail and we were just standing, sharing Mini. "Do you like kids?"

Well no shit, Stefan.

"I love them," she tells me in an even tone. I ignore her a bit and try not to dwell on the tenseness of the air. I needed my fucking mail.

"I uh..." Why am I talking like this? "Could you hold my child?" Elena giggles at my question and then nods enthusiastically. Well, it doesn't take much to make her happy.

I'm sort of jealous because Mini goes straight in her arms and snuggles toward her chest like she's known her forever. She holds her perfectly, just like I had to look up online to do. So I kind of hurry to get my mail out, so that way Mini doesn't get to comfortable.

"Nellie," Elena hums kind of nostalgically, "Did your wife name her?" I shake my head and pull out the contents of my mail box.

"No, I don't have a wife."

"Girlfriend?"

"No."

"I'm sorry," she says sincerely. I nod and I'm really not sure how to ask for my baby back from this girl because she looks like she could rip my balls off so I decide offer an alternative.

"Want to walk me back to my apartment?"

She eyes me warily and I backtrack. "No, I mean, you seem to have fun holding her, and I have this mail to carry, so..." The only mail in my hands was a coupon to Pizza Hut. She bites back her laughter and nods.

"Okay. Stefan, you're really funny. Kind of stupid, but really funny," she remarks. I've never met a stranger or a girl that's called me stupid before. My mind races. Did I even say anything funny? I'm not even being my charming, arrogant, self. We start walking back, and I furrow my eyebrows.

"Why do you say that?"

"You've been walking around me like you think I'm going to rip your head off." More like balls, but okay.

"You're pretty intimidating," I admit. Elena seems like a nice girl. A nice hot girl. A nice hot girl who actually gets along with Nellie. This could be an issue.

Elena laughs, "I'm not. I don't _try_ to be. It's what my job entails."

I try not to be caught up in how pretty she is when she smiles. I can't just start acting like a pussy because the girl is attractive to me. "What's your job?"

"I work at rehabilitation center," she tells me, "I work with people with addictions. Our cases come from family members that ask us to help their relatives."

I find myself actually interested in what she's saying. "What would make you want to do that?"

"I think it's remarkable. I have a younger brother, and I think the bond between siblings or family in general is pretty impeccable. It warms my heart to see people doing things for the people they love." She was definitely passionate about her work, that's for sure. I didn't want to tell her what I did for a living. Being a factory worker isn't the first thing I want to tell her about me.

I've always been really independent about everything I did. When I was adopted, my parents had a lot of money, but I never took any of it, even to get into college.

The outcome of putting my pride first, was that I ended up having to pay off school that I only went to for two years. I live paycheck to paycheck, which could be quite the struggle.

I was always proud of my success. I was an adopted teen and I made it out pretty unscathed. I got a job, went to college for a couple years, and had good friends. I was never ashamed to let people know that, because for the circumstances, you can get away with pretty much anything.

I'm a little ashamed right now.

_He's got a kid, and he has no career._

I smile at her and when we reach the apartment door, she continues toying with the baby. What is with this chick?

"She seems to like you," I tell her honestly. Nellie always pulled on Bonnie's hair and Nik teased her too much, so Mini was just as annoyed with him as I am.

"Kids love me," she says seriously. I'm a little sick of her attitude just because I've never had someone act like this to me. She acts twice as cocky as I do, except she isn't as smirky. She's dead serious.

"Are you always so odd?"

"Yes, but right now I'm mostly trying to get a reaction out of you."

"It's working," I say sarcastically, "Can I have my kid back?"

"Maybe in a second." I stare at her for a long moment, and my traitorous kid tucks her face into Elena's chest.

"You're insane," I tell her. She snorts and laughs and I bite back a smile because I've decided I don't like this girl and I'm not going to laugh at her jokes or her cute snorts.

"You asked me to hold your child, did you not?" Her eyes twinkle with mirth and I scowl.

"For a second."

"Actually, you didn't give a time frame. I have to be to my yoga class in an hour, I should be done by then." Fuck no. I'm not even going to get caught up in the fact that she goes to yoga, and is probably rather bendy.

"This is my Mini and I's time together. This is fucking kidnapping."

She smiles, "Shh, don't curse." She chastises me, looking down at Nellie with a grin. This woman was fucking nuts. She isn't keeping my baby for another damn hour. I run a hand through my hair and bite on my lip. She watched me for a moment and then quickly returned her gaze to my baby.

"Give me my fucking kid."

"I said to stop cursing."

"I said to give me Mini."

"Her name is Nellie, and you're going to scare her."

I glare at her and shake my head, "Just give me my baby back," I growl, "you can't just take someone's kid."

"I'm not taking her," she clarifies in a snotty tone, "I'm just standing here. In front of your door."

I can feel my face turning red and I scowl at the floor. I can't just grab Nellie. If I were a chick, I could punch her, but I'm a guy, and I don't hit girls. I could call Bonnie, but she would probably join this wackos side.

I haven't felt this mad in forever.

"Besides, what are you going to do?"

"Call the fucking cops!" I lose it, and I yell. I think she wanted that all along because she smiles at me the biggest she ever has, and she looks so fucking beautiful but that isn't important at all right now. I knew this chick was crazy. I just knew it.

My neighbor comes out the door and he's this 50 year old man with a gas problem. I've never actually spoken to him before, so I'm surprised when he sticks his head out to see us.

"What's going on out here?" He mumbles tiredly. Suddenly, Elena gets a solemn look on her face. She turns to the man, and shakes her head.

"Nothing at all," her voice cracks and she looks like she's going to cry.

"What the hell?" I shout, because this girl is nuts. She's hot as hell, but she's nuts. "Give me my kid!"

An innocent expression casts over her face. "Okay, Stefan." She hands Nellie over, and lays a kiss on her forehead. "Mommy's gonna be back. When Daddy stops yelling, I promise I'll be back."

I don't know what to say, because the old man looks like he's going to get a gun. I swear I hear a gun cock. Then Elena wipes this fake ass tear and stomps away. And of course I watch her ass, because I'm still a guy, and it is still a nice ass.

As if this wasn't enough, Mini starts crying like a mother fucker. "Dammit," I mutter. The old man's eyes stay trained on me in a cold glare.

I have no patience left. "What?" I snap at him. He recoils, but then shakes his head.

"This isn't even her kid! This is my baby!" I exclaim angrily. He slams the door on my face, and Mini cries harder.

I open the door to my apartment and mutter curses as I look for the pacifier.

* * *

"If you don't care, why are you still talking about it?"

"Because, there has to be a law somewhere about this shit. I've been looking for her and-"

"Why are you looking for her?" Bonnie says with a taunting look. Nellie pulls on her hair and she flinches. Good girl.

"Because, she stole Nellie. Almost."

"She wasn't going to steal her, Stefan. I've never seen you this worked up before. I think it's funny." Of course you do.

I'm not going to lie and say that Elena hasn't been on my mind the past week. She hasn't been at her apartment this week, and I'm still pissed but halfway intrigued and concerned. That makes me more pissed.

I don't care about her at all, I care that she stole my kid. That's what I'm concerned about. I think.

"She's nuts, and Mini wouldn't stop crying for an hour after she left. She even spat out her pacifier. This chick has put me through hell this past week. I deserve an apology," I announce indignantly. Bonnie scoffs and feeds Mini more formula.

"I don't think she's thinking about this half as much as you are."

That's another thing that pisses me off! She just swoops in, ruins my life and makes me all crazy, and then leaves.

That should be illegal too.

"You should really get her more food instead of formula," Bonnie says, straying from the topic. I accept and appreciate the change and nod.

"I want to, but they haven't sent me any allergies and things for her." Mini visibly perks up at the mention of her and lets out a little 'gah'.

Bonnie hums and I continue,"Nik and I have been looking up cases online, and all these kids throats close up and shit, it's crazy."

Bonnie laughs at that and puts the formula down. "Stay away from the internet. And stop cursing around Nellie! Months are going to fly by, and soon she's gonna be saying her first words. If it's 'fuck', I'm going to rip you a new one."

That would be funny, but her first words need to be daddy.

I looked up an article online, and they told me that if I say the word a lot, she might catch on. So lately, I've been doing a lot of talking to her in third person:

"Daddy's here."

"Eat for daddy."

"Daddy loves you."

The 'L' word was another big milestone. I surprised myself when I said it, but I definitely meant it. How could I not love my Mini? It was overwhelming how quickly I'd turned into a dad and how good I was getting at it.

"I need to get a new babysitter. Lora Underwood says she can't do it anymore. Monday through Thursday...is that really so hard?"

"Yes," Bonnie says as she scowls at Nellie for pulling her hair again, "People work."

"It's afternoons."

"If it's so easy, you would be able to do it," she says, daring me to argue. I don't.

We sit for a moment, and I toss back a beer while I watch some _CSI: Miami_. Bonnie breaks the silence with something I've been dreading for a long time.

"Have you told your parents? Damon?"

"Now, why would you ask me that? I'm in my element, Bennett, I don't have time for heartbreak." She rolls her eyes and if she could, she'd be hitting my shoulder right now.

"You need to tell them. This isn't fair."

I hum and ignore her. I really don't want to fight with Bonnie, because she's like my little sister, and every time she gets angry with me I always get really guilty. But also, I don't want to tell my parents. I don't even care if it's a dick move anymore. I thought about what Elena said when she wasn't being a nutcase. When she was talking about the bond between a family.

I never had that bond, because I was not family. After deducing that I loved Nellie, I know I love her far too much to give her the half-assed love I had to endure growing up. Nellie was going to be spoiled with people who gave a shit; people who genuinely gave a shit. I'd make sure of it.

"It wouldn't be fair to Nellie to put her in that family, anyway."

"But it _is_ fair for you to take away her only grandparents?"

"How many kids do you have, Bonnie?" I snapped. She shut her mouth and glared at me.

"Don't be a dick, Stefan."

"No, seriously. You seem to think this is all a walk in the park for me. You think I haven't thought about all that? I'm not a damn idiot. I know shit too. Not just from the internet, either. I know you think that you know a side to Damon that I don't. But the truth is, we haven't spoken in years, and I'm not about to show up at Christmas time barreling a baby, so they can judge Nellie and I. Nellie can have other grandparent figures."

"You don't even know how they would act, Stefan. You're bitter, and acting close-minded."

"I don't know how they would act? They fucking raised me, Bennett. You don't know how they would act. I don't know where you got this image of the Salvatore family from, but it's twisted."

She pauses and bites on her thumb nail. "Damon told me-"

"Half the stuff Damon spurts out comes straight from his asshole."

That was that.

* * *

"How's Nellie?" A voice goads from behind me. I look back and squint my eyes. I'll be damned.

Maybe I should pinch myself. "You sure have a way of pulling a nice, dramatic, disappearing act." She chuckles at that and walks toward her mailbox. Right next to mine. She smells really good, which I always liked about girls.

"I didn't disappear, Stefan. You just haven't seen me in a while. The socially acceptable response would be to ask me how I am in return."

I pull myself a little closer to her, no longer intimidated by the basket case, "I'm not always socially acceptable."

She lets out an airy laugh and eyes me warily, "What, no screaming? I'm surprised," she teases. I put my hand to my chest dramatically.

"You mean, I'm not the only one who you pulled a psychotic stunt on? I don't know if I should be relieved, or offended."

She gives me a lazy, sarcastic smile, and turns on her heel after slamming her mailbox shut. I follow her on her heels and she wheels around to give me a dubious look. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Nothing, I'm just making sure a pretty woman gets to her home safely." She squints her eyes at me suspiciously and sighs.

"I'm far too tired to be dealing with your shit today," she relents. I perk up a little at her crestfallen expression and continue to follow her up the steps.

"Rough day?"

"Rough week," she says with a bitter laugh.

I raise an eyebrow. "Is it a patient?"

She nods sadly, "Yeah, but he's a little closer to home than most." I motion for her to continue, and she does, but not without giving me an annoyed look. "I'm not going to tell you much, only that he isn't as motivated as he should be, and it's hard to get that motivation going, you know?"

I nod, because I can be an attentive listener and nice person when I want to be. Plus, I want to know why she left that whole week and why it bothered me so much.

"I bet you didn't want to know all this when you decided to follow me up here," she kids, lifting her shoulders back into her confident pose. I scoff.

"I followed you up here so that I could watch your ass, but being a venting toy was just as fun. You know, if you ever want to get together sometime, and judging by your expression, you might want to, feel free to drop by my house. Anytime." She stares blankly at me and then reaches out and hits my shoulder. Hard.

"Fuck," I curse, rubbing the spot. She glares at me and turns to her door.

"What, you're just going to walk away?"

"Yes, I'm going to walk away, otherwise I might end up shoving my foot up your ass."

I feel my voice getting louder, "No! Let's talk about this; let's talk about how you've been fucking him everyday for the past month, on our couch, with our child in the room!"

Her face dawns in realization and her face heats up. "Stefan, this isn't going to work," she whispers indignantly. Her eyes flash with a cross between annoyance and amusement.

I try harder, "You don't give a shit about her, and now you're going to take her from me? Fuck you, Elena. Fuck you."

Her glare intensifies and a girl, maybe our age, opens the door, seemingly on her way to work. She looks up at me with frightened gray eyes and I glare at her. Elena turns to utter something to her, but I stop her.

"Don't try to play the fucking victim, okay? You're not taking my fucking kid. You can keep fucking the mailman, but you are not going to take my kid."

Then Elena crumbles, and she's not the confident girl I met at the mailbox. She looks flustered and embarrassed, but angry and hot as hell.

The woman with the gray eyes looks at me with pity. Good. "And another thing, stop calling my phone. We're fucking done. You'll hear from my lawyer."

Then I leave her, standing there, until she unfreezes and starts yelling curses.

"You jackass!" I hear her shout.

At first I just snort, but then I start laughing really, really, hard. I think she hears me, because her insults get louder. Huh. I guess I see the appeal to this after all.

**Thanks for reading! Sorry for any mistakes!**


	3. I Don't Want It Anyway

**You all are too sweet! I really am so glad you like the story! Special thanks to Sofia Ashraf for beta-ing this and to Angie for singing to me while I wrote this. **

Chapter 3: I Don't Want It Anyway

Matt leans forward, and pokes Mini on her little belly. Mini widens her eyes and makes a sound before blinking blankly at him.

He nods emphatically, "She's definitely your kid." I try not to be offended by whatever he was talking about, because I had a sneaking suspicion Matt was on drugs. It was a good thing that he ate a lot, because any time his mouth wasn't full, shit spewed out.

He keeps going, "Do you have any interest in buying her, like, a beanie?" I shake my head and scowl at him.

"Yeah, no. No fucking way am I letting you watch Nellie." He doesn't get all pissed or offended, instead he flops himself down on my couch and shrugs.

"Your choice, man. I'd still look into beanies; I read this article at work one time about how beanies are both fashionable and reasonable during the winter season. Actually, I was considering getting one for myself."

Sigh. I felt like needles were being plunged into my skull. I have not been getting enough sleep with Mini around. Yes, I loved her, but all the diaper-changing, bottle-heating, and bedtime-rocking was getting on my nerves.

"I need a babysitter," I complain, scooping a bit of banana baby food for my Mini. Matt shrugs again and grabs his beer off of my coffee table, taking a large sip.

He mulls it over a little before scratching his head, "Don't you get money from Mini?"

"Yeah, but not enough to sustain both our lives. I need to go back to work before I'm fired." He scoffs and tilts his beer back once more.

"They aren't even thinking of you over there. The day they fire you is the day..." he trails off, not knowing what else to say and shakes his head. Fucking bonkers. "Why don't you ask that girl you were talking about? You told me Nellie liked her."

I shake my head vehemently, "I haven't spoken to her in three days, and I don't like her, remember? Plus, I'm not asking her for handouts."

He scratches at his head again, "You asked me to babysit, what's the difference?" The difference is that she's a girl. She's a girl with great _assets _that already thinks I'm a dick anyway. I don't care what she thinks, but if I did care, I wouldn't want her doing things like that for me. Just...because.

His eyes widen, "Are you embarrassed?"

I squint my eyes at him, "No, I'm not fucking embarrassed. What kind of question is that, anyway? I just don't want to ask her because I don't like her," I practically growl. Matt slowly grins and shakes his head.

"Whatever, man."

God, I don't know why I even hung out with that bastard. Mini looked up at me and began to babble a little. I tickle her tummy a little with my left hand, trying to get her to laugh. She looks up at me, completely straight faced, and lets out a little grunt. I sigh, remembering how Elena so effortlessly got her happy and content, and begin to talk to her.

"Why won't you laugh for daddy?" She says nothing, but if I could read her mind it'd probably be something along the lines of:

"Because you aren't fucking funny."

Of course, only if she's anything like I am. "You don't ever smile at me," I kind of pout at her, then I freeze. I think I see a hint of a smile starting to form. _Finally_.

It's just the smallest hint, like a little ghost. I just needed a little more.

I keep pouting and the hint is more pronounced. She's basically already there. I feel my chest pound with paternal pride I didn't even know I possessed.

Fuck yes.

_My Mini's going to do it today._

"Do you like when daddy's in pain?" I deepen my pout and I swear she's going to smile but then Matt yells at the television set like a feral animal.

"No! No!" Matt roars, sitting stoically on the edge of the couch. Mini grows alarmed and begins to cry. I want to cry now too.

I pick up a shoe off the floor and throw it at him before I reach for the pacifier. "Dude, what the fuck? Are you seriously...? Are you crying? What the hell?" I give Mini the pacifier and she immediately shuts up, only letting out quiet little pants.

Matt struggles to regain himself as he stares motionless at the television, wiping a stray tear off his cheek. "She said she _wasn't in love with him anymore_." I need new friends. I turn to the show and notice it's the CW. I cringe and rub my forehead.

Matt continues like I didn't say anything. "This fucking sire bond, man; it ruined everything. They were so happy." He lets out a sniffle and I swear I'm going to explode.

"Get the fuck out."

He sniffles again and looks up at me like some kind of lost puppy, "What?"

"Get out of my house right the fuck now." He looks appalled but then scowls at me, turning off the TV. I lean forward and rub my Mini's shoulder as she whimpers and pants and glare at him. He slowly stands up and makes his way out the door.

"Dude, Stefan, where am I going to go? Bonnie kicked me out, too." I shrug and he growls before slamming the door. I turn to Nellie and sigh. "The dope-head is gone, want to smile now?"

She blinks.

I groan, "Yeah, I didn't think so either. You're too good for this world, Mini."

* * *

This is the third day I woke up hard.

Very hard.

I kept having these vivid dreams of Elena, and it was starting to drive me insane.

It would be me and her, on a bed somewhere exotic or something. Her hair is everywhere and it smells so good and she says all these fucking sweet things to me that make me want her more and more. I would never actually fuck her, though. She'd just grind over on top of me, and that's as far as it went. Hell, I didn't even get to see _dream _Elena's boobs yet!

She even teases me in my dreams.

I'd wake up, hard and confused, desperately wanting release and not from my own hand. It was a good thing these dreams came along after Nellie got her own crib.

Ever since I saw her all flustered and angry, calling me names and cursing, all I could think about was taking her to my bed and uh...taking her.

I tuck my erection into a pair of sweats and push myself off the bed to the corner of my room. I check Mini in her crib, and she's all soft snores and pursed lips. I check to make sure she's breathing and everything's alright before I slip on some shoes to go get the mail.

I'm halfway out the door before I peek back in. Should I take Mini? I try to think back to soap operas and if they ever left the babies for a quick second. It's not like I'm abandoning her; I'm just going to go get the mail and get some air.

_Yeah, I'll be back._

Unless some strange man comes in and takes her.

Fuck no. I grab my little baby carrier that makes me look like a true DILF (Dad I'd Like To Fuck, I recently found out) and reach in the crib for Mini. She shakes and stirs before her eyes peer at mine curiously.

"Don't blame me, blame old perverted men," I tell her.

I walk down the stairs, still a bit delirious from my sleep. I reach in my sweats pocket and grab for the mail key before I spot a familiar ass.

"Hey!" I yell loudly at her. She gets this really pissed look on her face.

She crosses her arms as she looks at me, annoyed and amused. "Trying to start another fight?"

I chuckle and wave my mailbox key in the air, "Just checking my mail and your ass." She scoffs at me and motions to my baby carrier.

"Let me hold Nellie," she requests sternly, sticking her own key in her pocket. I glare at her and shake my head.

"You need to learn some manners, woman."

"_Please_," she says with an false innocent smile. Against my better judgment, I motion for her to take Nellie out the carrier. She pulls her out, making her extremely close to me. She smells so fucking good. I nearly hold my breath until she finally cradles Nellie in her arms. My Mini looks so goddamn happy to see her, too. She tilts her head down at her with a real, genuine smile, and coos. She was really fucking adorable sometimes.

Ahem.

I meant Mini.

I open up my mailbox and rush through the papers, clicking my tongue as I looked. Suddenly, Elena appears beside me. "What you did last time, it wasn't cool at all."

I nod and smile, "Well, ditto. I think you learned a lesson, right?"

She smiles sheepishly, "I was a little impressed. You know, you could've been more creative. Fucking the mailman was very generic and cliché." Not going to lie, her saying the word 'fuck' went straight to my dick. Like my dreams weren't an enough tease.

I nod, "Generic and cliché is so me," I say blandly.

Suddenly I feel a very sharp pain on my left shin. The sensation burned and it felt like a very distinct high heel shoe annihilating my shin repeatedly but only once. I drop my mail and fall to the floor with a deep hiss and hold my ankle, trying not to cry. That really, really, hurt. I moan at the pain and open one eye to see Nellie, with that damn hint of a smile.

Fuck it, Mini is going to smile. She will smile.

"Elena, hit me again." She looks appalled, probably thinking I was getting off to this. "Fucking hit me."

She unfreezes and shrugs before landing another kick to my stomach. I roll to the floor, and growl. Holy hell this hurts. What is she, the Karate Kid? I gasp at the pain and take a deep breath. She was damn strong.

"Hit me again."

She wastes no time, and lands another kick to my thigh that I grasp a hold of, and double over, panting. Then I hear it. The sound of heaven gates opening and Angels laughing.

It's like a thousand silver chimes ringing at once, a light little giggle that went out her tiny little mouth and straight to my heart. She just kept doing it now too, like doing it once was the hardest part.

I started laughing incredulously as the pain started to subside, looking up at Elena with happy eyes. I was fucking happy. Elena watched as Mini giggled once more and I laughed with her.

"Mini, you're amazing," I tell her, still laughing, "You're laughing, little one. You're fucking laughing."

I can feel Elena's eyes on me as I stand and take my Mini out of her hands, mail momentarily forgotten. "Are you laughing at daddy?" I mutter, chuckling at her. She giggles again, her smile so bright and happy I want to die. "You can laugh at me, that's okay. I love you, Mini. I love you, because you just laughed!"

I'm nearly hysterical and I feel Elena place a hand on my shoulder. "This is her first time laughing?"

I nod vigorously with a smile so big and proud, Elena had to smile back. I rock Mini in my arms as Elena makes funny faces at Mini that make her giggle galore. I look at the woman, who doesn't look like she'd make a funny face in her life, practically give her heart and soul into making a baby laugh. She pulls her ears, mushes her lips, scrunches her nose...the whole nine yards. I laugh along with her, snorting at her ridiculousness. This feeling of fatherhood was new; I was watching my child grow a little older.

She looked extra beautiful, flicking her tongue out at Mini and laughing like she belonged here. We just sat in this mail spot, pretending the world didn't exist and it was only the three of us. Elena looked up at me watching her, and time just fucking froze.

Her smile began to fade, and she looked at my eyes and then at my lips, like she was waiting for me to do something or say something. I couldn't stop looking in her eyes, because they were so brown and so her. Everything was so her in that moment. Maybe it's because we shared a milestone about Mini together, or the fact that I just got finished dreaming about her, or that her ass looked amazing today, but I never wanted her more than I did in this moment.

It's the one time we weren't bickering, and it'd probably be the last. It's very wholesome, intimate, comfortable, and we felt like a family.

Hold the fucking phone.

I break my gaze from her and start coughing. She looks at me confusedly and tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. "You okay?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine."

I look down at Mini who looks laughed out. "I think it's time for Mini and daddy to go home," I say, stressing on the fact that it was just the two of us and there was no third party. At all.

She gives me a strange look and nods, "Okay, Stefan. You're funny."

"So you've said," I say, moving Mini back into the little carrier. She straightens up and brushes her hair out of her eyes, easily resuming her role as head bitch.

She nods. "I'm serious, but whatever. You can um, have fun with the situation going on in Nellie's pants."

I breathe in and am brutally attacked by the smell of pure shit. I gaze down at Mini and give her a disgusted look. "Really?" She lets out a tired giggle. I roll my eyes and start to walk away.

"Hey Stefan?"

"Yes, Elena?"

"Tell anyone that I made those faces, and I will throat punch you," she says giving me a devilish smirk before walking away.

* * *

I let out a gust of air as I move a box across the table. "Why are you freaking out?"

"I'm not freaking out," I protest, running a hand through my hair. Bonnie, still pissed at me, says nothing, and I cringe at that.

Nik gives me a knowing smirk. "Does it have to do with your neighbor?"

No, it doesn't. I have been indulging in a special Elena detox. There obviously was a reason from God above that all our encounters were so far apart; I could only take so much before I started thinking crazy thoughts.

It was okay for me to be sexually attracted to the girl. I can deal with things like that. Hell, I'm attracted to a lot of girls. One thing that I did not do was become sexually attracted to girls and think of them as...family. That crosses a whole new line. A whole dangerous, new, yet exciting, line.

Since then, I can't even get her scent out of my head. I smother myself in my pillow at night, and I see her face. I walk down to the mailbox and check out all the asses to ensure that none of them are hers before I allow myself to check my mail. I swear I see her at the grocery store, but it's never actually her. I listen to music and I hear her voice...

It's insane.

Maybe she's a witch, and this is all her witchy voo-doo coming back to bite me in the ass for embarrassing her last week.

Not to mention, I couldn't ask her to babysit even though I know, through light stalking, that she doesn't work on Wednesday. Instead, I sent my baby to 'Jenna', two doors down. She was trustworthy—not maternal—but trustworthy.

I really wish I could talk to Bonnie about this, because she would know what to do about the situation, but she has been ignoring my like the plague.

"No, I'm just nervous about Mini, is all." I lie effortlessly. Bonnie lifts an eyebrow, and then drops it back into place. She knows me too well. "I really want to go home and check on her."

Katherine, a girl who worked in the back of the factory, leans over to stroke my arm. "Look at you, daddy." Her voice was sickeningly sweet as she smiled at me.

I let Katherine suck me off _once_. Ever since, the girl's been on me like white on rice. She always touches me, but she touches a shit load of other guys too; I wouldn't touch her vagina with a stick.

Matt, however, doesn't have that high of standards. He fucks her on the daily, I hear. I never ask him, because I honestly did not want to know.

I pry my arm away and adjust my shirt, "Yeah, look at me." Bonnie looks like she might smile but when I look at her, her mouth snaps shut.

I tap her foot under the table we're eating at and she looks up. I mouth an apology and she scowls at me. I give her a pleading look and she shakes her head.

I jut out my lip a little and her face relaxes into a grin before she giggles. "Okay," she says, nodding.

"Okay," I say back. The table looks at us, mouths full of food, and then ignore us again. I pick up my food and slide it across the table to Bonnie, and walk around to plop by her side.

I sigh. "Something has happened," I whisper quietly.

She takes a sip from her Snapple and tosses a carrot in her mouth. "Did your dick fall off?"

"No," I roll my eyes, "Worse. I had some bad thoughts about Elena."

She snorts and then laughs really hard. "You what?"

I glare at her as she laughs, big ruptures shaking her small body. "I had bad thoughts. Like...thoughts unlike myself." I look at the people around us, hoping no one could hear me.

"About what, Stefan?"

"Like family?" I blurt out confusedly, "Like I thought, after Mini laughed, that we looked like a family." I admit a bit ashamed.

Bonnie squints her eyes and tilts her head. "And _that _freaks you out?"

"More than anything."

"Why?"

"You're not supposed to be my psychologist, you're supposed to be my friend. What do I do?" She takes another sip of her drink and sighs.

"Well, what did you do?"

"I left."

"You left?" I nod, stealing a carrot from her. "How did you leave?"

"I said something about having to go home, she called me funny, made me promise her something and then I left."

"Promise her what?"

"I can't tell because I'm having bad thoughts."

She snickers and shakes her head, "Stefan, do you like Elena?" I shrug and nibble on the carrot a little more.

"She's alright."

"No, I mean like, do you want to be in a relationship with her?"

Huh. I hadn't been in a relationship since my first year in college. God, it fucking sucked. It was fine in the beginning, but after awhile the girl went batshit on me. "I don't know, not really," I mutter. Then I think about it. Does that give me full access to the ass? Bragging rights to Nik, too? It wouldn't be that bad, just a little unorthodox. It made me want to throw up.

"Elena is...different," I add, confusing myself. "Like...really, really, different. I've never met a girl like her before, so I don't even know what our relationship would be like." I want to reach down to check that my balls are still intact.

"You think she likes you?"

"I don't know," I whisper, frustrated, "She doesn't act like it. But_ fuck_, I don't know how she would act. I compliment her ass, and she is a bitch to me. She likes Nellie, but I don't think she likes me. Not like that, at least."

Bonnie dips another carrot in ranch, "Stefan, I think if she doesn't flip out for talking about her ass, she's probably at least attracted."

I nod, not fully understanding what I'm supposed to do with that information. No offense, but I know I'm attractive.

"Well, how do I do this?"

"You need to talk to her, and calm down. Just see if you like her."

"How do I do that?"

She impatiently growls and rolls her eyes. "Just ask yourself if you like talking to her, and want to know more about her. If you do, ask her out on a date. Now if you'd excuse me, my break is over."

She gets up, pats my shoulder, and leaves._  
_

* * *

"I'm going into the jungle tonight, Mini."

She looks up at me with wide blue eyes as I feed her and continue talking. "I'm going to take Bonnie's advice, and see if I like Elena. I've never actually liked a chick, so this is pretty taxing on my heart right now." Mini doesn't say anything. It's amazing.

"I don't think I like her, because she's so weird. I'm going to try anyway, because this has gone on long enough. You're going to come with me too, you know? Break the ice."

I fix the ribbon that Bonnie put in Mini's hair and hoist her up on my arm, swaying her a little. "Ready to go see my little psycho? I mean _the_ psycho. See?"

I open the door to my apartment and creep out like I'm in some kind of action film. I'm already about halfway down the hall, humming horribly in Mini's ear as she's giggling, and I can practically smell danger.

Suddenly, I hear a laugh that sounds a lot like Elena's and a male laugh right next to it. Their shoes patter down the stair case, and I stealthily hide behind it, bringing my index finger to my lips to silence Mini.

"It's really ridiculous, but it was a great opportunity. You would have loved it, I remember you used to love those things," the male voice says, and I see a tan man with dark hair wrap an arm around Elena's shoulder.

She doesn't shrug him off, but instead, leans in and looks up at him happily. "You always made me go to those damn things, I had to love them eventually." He laughs at her and places a hand above "the ass" and leads her out the door.

"Miss Gilbert, you're funnier and funnier every day," he jokes. Gilbert, huh? A strange surge of something hits my chest and I hold Mini a bit tighter so I don't lose it. That's fucking _our _thing. We aren't anything to each other, but she calls me funny, and I secretly think she is. Who the fuck is this asshole calling her funny. And nearly touching the ass. My ass.

I'm irrationally mad and I know it.

When the door shuts, I look down at Nellie and sigh. "I don't like her, Mini." I tell her, walking back to the apartment, "I may have liked her, or thought I did, but now I swear, I'm over Elena Gilbert. No more thinking about her, either." We reach my door and I unlock it, then slam it once I'm inside.

"It's just going to be Mini and Daddy now, no more psycho."

I swear she starts to frown.

**Thank you for reading!**


	4. Jammy to Your Cupcakes

**Super stoked to get this chapter out to you this week! Special thanks to my lovely beta Sofia for fixing all my stupid mistakes and, of course, thank you all for reviewing and showing your love! I appreciate it so much!**

* * *

Chapter 4: Jammy to Your Cupcakes

Mini opened and closed her hand before making a tiny fist and bringing it to her mouth. She sucked on it loudly, slobber dribbling down her chin and on her dress. I gave a sheepish look at Jenna, who stood with one hand placed firmly on her left hip.

"How was she?" I say, rocking her tiny body in my arms. Jenna brought her finger up to her lip and looked up in deep thought.

Suddenly she gasped and gave a sarcastic grin, "Well, she spat up all over my carpet. Two times." I cringe and scratch at my neck. "Then she cried and would not stop. I gave her the pacifier, and she spat it out."

I looked down at Nellie and scowled. "Did you try music?" I say offhandedly, "Nellie loves music."

Jenna scoffs and rolls her eyes, "Well not enough to shut up when the_ Young and the Restless_ is on. Seriously, Stefan. She obviously misses you a lot." I could feel Jenna getting pissed by every passing second.

I close my eyes and inhale before giving Jenna a shaky grin. I owed her my life and my paycheck. "Thanks for this week, Jenna." I turn on my heel and she smiles at me before promptly closing the door. As I walk back to my apartment, I decide that Mini needs a stern talking to.

"Mini, you know I love you, right? You're my mini," I start, cradling her gently. Mini spits on her shirt. Sigh. "I do these things, because I love you. I go to work to pay the bills so you can have a crib, and a house and everything you need and some of the things that you want. You gotta make this easier. This is the third time you did this."

She garbles out something, sticking her tongue out and grins. "It isn't funny," I tell her, even though my face hurts from smiling. I missed my Mini this week. I had today, tomorrow, and the weekend with my girl.

I wasn't going to waste a second.

I open up the door to my apartment and settle on the couch, tucking Mini into my arm. I rub her arm and hum some songs to her, eating some potato chips on the table. I really was trying to be patient with Mini because I have been super busy trying to bring in some steady income. Getting a good babysitter was hard. Getting a good babysitter that Mini liked was nearly impossible. The first time I left her with Jenna, she was decent. Sure, she cried a lot, ate a lot, and was restless until I got home, but it was nothing compared to when I left her with Nik. She threw toys at his head, cried, threw some more toys and then spat up all over her clothes. Nik and Mini didn't get along at all. I can't deny I was a little proud, though.

I smile at the old thought before I hear an urgent knock at the door. Mini peers up at me and then at the door before she closes her eyes in exasperation. The rapping continues and I lean down to give Mini a big kiss on her cheek.

"Let's not get that." She opens her eyes and makes a happy 'dah' sound that I grin at. The knocking at the door stops, and I resume my lazy ritual, reaching into my chip bag. I keep humming when suddenly I hear a 'click' noise. I stand up abruptly, keeping Nellie nestled on the couch, ready to kill whoever decided to barge in. My front door handle turns twice before it bursts open for me to see a very frazzled looking Elena.

"What the fuck?"

* * *

"I can't believe that you broke into my house for this shit. We're not done talking about that, by the way."

Elena shrugs and runs a hand through her long hair that falls just above the nice ass. I've missed that ass. "Yeah, well. I needed your help."

Mini seems happy as hell to see her, because she nearly bounces in my carrier, reaching her hands out to touch Elena. Elena gives her a finger that Mini latches onto happily.

"How do you lose a guinea pig anyway?" She glares at me and scowls, pulling a hat thing out of her pocket. She shrugs but then looks down, and she looks really sad. I feel really bad for a second, and something in my chest makes me shudder in regret for teasing her.

"I don't know. It's not lost, it's just missing."

I didn't want to tell her that her logic was lost on me, so I just zipped up my hoodie and followed her up to her apartment. It was such a weird thing, but I could not tell this girl 'no'. Sure, it took a ton of coercing to ruin my day with Mini to search for a fucking guinea pig, but I think I knew from the moment she opened her mouth, I was going to do whatever she wanted.

I can't help that I have a sweet spot for the girl. Maybe if she wasn't crazy, didn't have a boyfriend, didn't break into my house and didn't drive _me _crazy, I would like her. If I liked her, then maybe I would date her. Considering all of those things are true, I'm left not liking or caring about her. Sweet spot be damned.

When we reach her apartment, she pulls at the door handle and walks in, holding the door with her foot.

"So where do you think it is?"

She sighs. "Call him by his name."

"So where do you think Jammy Jam is?" I repeat, feeling very ridiculous and tired. She frowns and shrugs.

"I don't know. I had him on the loveseat over there," she points toward the brown chair in question, "just for a second so I could change his cage. Then, I looked back and he was gone."

I blink. "Why would you leave an animal on a seat unsupervised. I'm the king of irresponsible and even I know not to do that," I say, never mind the fact that I almost left Mini myself.

She grins sheepishly and walks toward me, crossing her arms over her chest. Her breasts are almost as good as her ass. I avert my gaze to her eyes and she gives me a knowing smile. "I didn't ask you to judge me, asshole. Just find Jammy."

When she says the name, it's cute.

I place my carrier of Mini on her couch, and immediately Elena floats over to her. I lift up the cushion on the seat and look between them cautiously, because I don't like rats.

"Are you hungry?" Elena asks me, rocking back and forth with a giggling Mini in her arms. I roll up my sleeves on my shirt and nod.

"Hungry as hell. Are you gonna cook for me?"

"No, I'm going to bake." Hm. That's hot.

I smirk. "Gonna' give me some of your cupcakes?" She laughs and shakes her head.

"That's an extremely crass way of putting it, but if you want cupcakes, you'll get cupcakes." Fuck yes. I carefully move the loveseat to the left, listening carefully so I don't hear a crunch or something.

I can't deal with a woman crying.

When I'm sure that the rodent is nowhere near the loveseat, I sigh and spin around on my foot to find Elena. The apartment is just like mine except mine is more plain and simple. Hers is anything but.

I follow the clanking noise and find Elena with her hair up, and Mini sitting in a carrier on top of a chair. Elena turns to me and grins. "Quit so soon?"

I ignore her and lean against the table. "Um. No. The thing isn't on the loveseat. I'm taking a break."

"You didn't even work for a minute."

"Stop complaining. I'm a weak man," she eyes me up and down before rolling her eyes and walking to her refrigerator. I decide to tease her. "Is there any way you could bend over for me? I've missed seeing your ass."

She turns, glares at me, and then picks up a spoon from the counter to throw at me. It misses me by a long shot and I chuckle, kicking it back toward her. "Do you want to try again?"

"Are you trying to be a little shit today?" She asks, yanking a gallon of milk out of the fridge. I shrug and pull out a chair at her table, and plopping down. I give a secretive smile to Nellie, but she looks half-asleep, little snores erupting from her mouth.

Words begin to pour out of my mouth. "I'm surprised you came to me." Elena furrows her eyebrows and brushes a strand of hair back.

"Why?"

"I saw you with your boyfriend the other day," I practically blurt out. I trace some patterns on the table with my pinky, and begin to tap my foot. I love distractions. "I thought that's what boyfriend's did, you know? Find..guinea pigs."

I don't bother looking up to see her expression, but I hear a lot of humor in her tone when she speaks.

"Yeah."

Some part of me hoped I was wrong about the Dark Haired Douche. I desperately wanted to believe that he was just an old friend who was a little too close for comfort. I don't know why I would want to believe that, but I think I conned myself into thinking he was nothing. He was obviously something. Some of that irrational anger I felt built up in my stomach and I glared at the table. I knew it would get me nowhere to pout, and considering I had zero claim on Elena whatsoever, I really had no reason to be angry at all. I just was. I'm not going to let this asshole dull my sparkle, though. I will be just as flirtatious and charming to Elena as I always was because she's a hot piece of ass and I am a man. A much better looking man than him, by the way.

I clench my jaw, "He seems like a nice douche. I meant guy." She snorts and I finally lift my head to see her grinning ear to ear. She looks like she's going to say something, but then stops.

"Go look for my Jammy, please."

* * *

Jammy is gone.

I really, really, really don't want to tell Elena, but it's true. The fucker must have escaped. I've looked all through her apartment, and I see nothing at all. I looked under her bed, the couch, the television, the love seat again and under the rug. The asshole took his chance and ran. I can't blame him.

The cupcakes smell amazing, so I walk back into the kitchen at least trying to sound optimistic.

"Well, I found some trails," I lie, nearly salivating at the plate of delicious cupcakes. All for me. I reach my hand out toward the spongy treat, licking the frosting first.

Elena smiles at me. "Really?"

"Mhm," I mumble, forcing the deliciousness into my mouth. My God, this woman could bake. I almost moan at the taste because it's vanilla and I love vanilla.

"Are they good?" She inquires, pouring two glasses of milk. I nod and plop down on my earlier seat. I grab for another one and my eyes travel to Mini. I chew the rest of the cupcake, and follow it down with a gulp of milk Elena hands me.

"She's asleep?"

Elena nods and smiles warmly. "Yeah, she was out like a light. Has she been sleeping lately?"

I lick the frosting of my second cupcake and sigh. "Not really. She doesn't like her babysitters."

"Babysitters?" Elena says, picking up a cupcake. She twirls her finger in the frosting and brings the finger into her mouth and hums. I know she's doing this on purpose. I can feel my pants tighten, so I look away and try to answer as best as I can in my affected state.

"I have to work. Monday through Thursday afternoon I need a babysitter and Mini hates them all."

Elena's face brightens and she smiles this special smile she very rarely does. "I can do it. Monday and Wednesday."

I almost choke on my cupcake. That'd be fucking perfect. Mini loves her and I know I can trust Elena despite her ability to lose a guinea pig. But like I said before, I do have some pride. "Really?"

"Yeah, if that's okay with you."

I try to find a way to remedy this. "I'll pay you—"

She cuts me off. "Don't worry about it, Stefan. It isn't a big deal."

I sigh. Fuck my life. She looks up at me with her brown sparkling eyes and I know I'll cave. Plus, I figure I need to put Mini first, and this would definitely make my life much easier. I need to get into her good graces anyways because once I finish my next cupcake, I'm going to have to tell her that her guinea pig is gone indefinitely.

"Okay," I say, distracting myself with a cupcake. We eat in silence, which for once was pretty okay. Usually, when I'm with a chick, all they do is fucking talk. It feels nice to just be quiet. That's why I love Mini so much. At least, when she isn't crying.

Finally, when I think I'm a safe distance away from Elena, I stand and cross my arms over my chest. "Hey, Elena?"

"Yes, Stefan?"

"I don't think Jammy is with us anymore," my voice wavers because of the nerves. I don't look at her face because if she cries, I will flip this apartment over a thousand more times until I find that damn thing. "It may have ran out the house." Or out the window.

I hear her sigh and then drop her head to the table. "Okay, Stefan."

I cringe and grimace as I run a hand through my hair. "I'm going to get going, now. I think Mini's about to wake up soon."

"Okay, Stefan." Fuck. She sounds so sad. I bite on my lip and grab the carrier off the table, trying my hardest not to jostle Mini.

I watch Elena stand up and grab some saran wrap for the cupcakes. Her back is facing toward me, but I can envision her sad face and it's killing me inside.

"You don't have to do that," I say, even though I would like nothing more for her to send me some cupcakes home with me. She shrugs and something in me snaps.

I place the carrier on the table, and take a few steps so I have Elena caged in my arms. My hands hold the edge of the counters beside me, and I feel her tense up at my presence. I try to be sympathetic, and imagine if my TV ran away or hell, even Mini. "Hey," I whisper softly. "Are you okay?"

She stills and then sighs. "I'm fine." She turns to me, the cupcakes all wrapped and ready. "Here. Thank you, Stefan."

I smile, "No problem."

I take my carrier and cupcakes, and start walking toward the door. Elena's behind me, probably checking out my ass or something. Do girls do that too?

I open the door and enter the hallway, turning to face her once more. She looks really beautiful today, but I wouldn't tell her that because 'beautiful' is too intimate. I raise the cupcakes up in my hand in grin.

"Thanks for the cupcakes. They will be eaten."

"I like baking. When I'm not working, it's all I do." I smile at that and nod.

"I'll drop Mini off on Monday?"

"Of course."

We stand there a bit awkwardly, but I give a sad smile to her anyway. "Sorry about Jammy."

"It's okay, Stefan. Jammy doesn't exist."

What. The. Hell.

"Excuse me?"

She looks like she's trying really hard to contain her laughter, but then she doesn't, and it comes out in large guffaws. "Did you not wonder why there was no cage? No guinea pig food? No...I don't know...guinea pig?"

She keeps laughing at me, but I'm absolutely done with this crazy girl. Who the hell does that shit? That isn't normal. Nothing about her is normal. I glare at her, partially still in shock. "You can't fucking do shit like that, Elena."

"Yes I can. Did you think I was going to let your little stunt you pulled on me go unheard of? No chance in hell. You aren't going to get the last word. Plus, I was lonely. I got a day off today and I missed Nel."

I'm walking away as she continues explaining through bursts of laughter. And I take my cupcakes.

* * *

"Mini, stay with Nik for just a quick second."

I can visibly see her pout before she starts crying and I scowl at the floor. I place my surprise on the ground before running toward her. I give her a kiss on her forehead, and she immediately calms down, only soft pants coming from her mouth.

"Daddy loves you Mini, I'll be right back. Just be a good girl for Daddy, okay?"

She doesn't seem too complacent with that idea, but she sniffles and I hand her her pacifier with another kiss. "I'll be right back," I remind her.

Nik curses over in the corner, stirring a pot of Mac N' Cheese while heating up a bottle. "Hurry up. Your spawn looks like she's going to start throwing shit. I'm not going to be here for that." He grabs a bottle of beer out the fridge as he speaks, looking for an opener. I point to the cabinet and slip on some shoes.

"Why the hell did you get that anyway?"

"Payback?"

"That's expensive payback." Not really. It was actually fairly cheap if you knew where to get it from. I pulled on a hoodie and yanked the heavy thing off the ground.

"It's fucking worth it," I tell him honestly.

"Is it? Because I've never seen you act like—"

"I'm fine and nothing has changed, dick. Now leave me alone."

Maybe I've been a bit obsessive lately, but nothing is wrong with that. That is perfectly normal.

I open the door with one hand, balancing the huge ass thing with another. I yank it open and start on my now familiar pathway to the wicked witch. Hopefully, she was with her boyfriend. Hopefully, he sees my note. He should know another guy is appreciating her fantastic ass.

I get to her apartment and I study her door to make sure no one is coming out or in. I place the baby guinea pig's cage right next to her door, careful not to make too much noise. I know she's home. I didn't buy her any food, but I pull a pen and paper out of my pocket and write out my scathing note that would hopefully piss her off:

_Dear NA (Nice Ass),_

_After tons and tons of searching, I found Jammy! The fucker ran all the way to the pet store on Elm. The cheap one that you can also play the lottery at? Yeah, there. I'm sure we can come together (pun intended) and figure out a way for you to repay me for my hard work. Other than that, don't mention it. See you Monday. _

_Stefan_

_PS: Cupcakes taste even better a day after._

Perfectly perfect. I place it on top of the cage and smile, leaning forward to give five good knocks on her door. I wait until I hear her footsteps before peel out of the hallway, stopping at the corner. I hear her door open and I also hear her yelp. She may joke about guinea pigs, but she obviously didn't like them too much. Good. I put my fist over my mouth to keep from laughing, but as I walk home to my Mini, I let it all out. Payback is a bitch.


	5. The Short Adventure of Assman

**Important AN: I know there are a great bunch of you (if not all of you) who read both Call Me Daddy and Run With You and this applies for both stories. This is more of a warning than anything else. I've just encountered a bit of a roller coaster in my life, and the updates that are scheduled every week are going to have to be cut down a bit. It's not a hiatus or anything, but for the next month the chapters for this and RWY may be few and far between. I didn't want you to be surprised if they aren't updated like usual. You can follow me on twitter ezonthewriting for follow ups and what not until my posting goes back to normal. This will definitely ensure a lot less mistakes in writing, longer chapters, and just a better story overall. Also, this chapter is just a filler/ transition for the next in which there will be a big milestone for Elena and Stefan. I'm really excited for that and I want to make it perfect!**

**On a brighter note, the response to this story has been amazing and I'm so humbled by your reviews! Each one brings a smile to my face, and I'm extremely glad that you like this story!**

**Special thanks to Sofia ( twitter: sofiastarz ) for working her magic every chapter for me!**

**Chapter ****5****: The Short Adventure of Assman**

"Smile," I say, demonstrating with my own mouth. I give the biggest grin that I can and rattle the camera in front of me. Mini widens her eyes and blinks at the offending device. She stares at it for awhile but then turns her head in dismissal. Dammit.

People actually take pictures of their children at young ages. Did you know that? Like, they documented their lives in..._baby books. _Truth be told, I never even had a camera before recently, and I sure as fuck didn't know how to use one. Bonnie showed me a couple examples, taking pictures of Mini when she was playing with her toys or biting Nik, but they weren't happy or smiling. Just annoyed or crying, which wasn't exactly what I wanted her to see when she was older. I wanted her to see pictures of herself smiling, giggling, or laughing. Mini smiled and laughed like crazy, but getting her to smile and laugh in front of a camera was basically mission impossible.

I sigh and push the camera down on the coffee table before filling my arms with a bundle of Mini. Picking up the remote, I lay with her in our usual stance; me on my back and her on my chest. We sit in silence for awhile, only the sound of her soft gurgles and the light buzz of _CSI_. I nearly fall asleep when I hear my phone starting to ring. I groan and Mini purses her little lips after letting a giggle seep through. I glare at her and reach for my phone on the coffee table.

Not bothering to look at the I.D, I flip it open and sigh. "Hello?"

There's a hesitant pause before whoever is on the other line talks. "Stefan." Immediately knowing his tone of voice, I almost hang up. Almost. I glance at Mini, who's completely oblivious to my internal turmoil and clear my throat.

"Damon," I sit up. Casually, I make the next step. "What's up?" I can hear the confusion even though he doesn't speak. Even though we weren't technically brothers, there was a _brothership_ that existed between the two of us and I hated it. Even as kids, Damon and I knew each other like the back of our hands. We were so similar, but so different. He could see me through and I could see right through him.

He waits another beat and I carefully lay Mini down on the couch. "I'm good, Stefan. I'm really good. How are you?"

"Good," I bite out, stealing his response. I make my way into the kitchen and yank open the refrigerator.

"How's Liz?"

"Mom's good," I didn't miss how he corrected me, but disregarded him. "Dad is too. We haven't spoken to you in a while."

"Well, typically those things can happen when people fight." I grab a beer from the fridge and slam it shut before yanking the opener out of a cabinet.

He ignores me. "Are you coming home for Thanksgiving or Christmas?"

"I'll be doing the same thing I was doing last year," I say. Well, this time I'd be with Mini. _Maybe even Elena. _I take a gulp of beer at that thought and shake my head.

His temper flares, "Fucking hell, Stefan. Put your pride down and come see your family." My temper flares too.

"If you called to spurt out the same bullshit you have been for years, you can fucking forget it and lose this number. I don't have time for this, I have a..." I pause and peer over at Mini on the couch. "I have a fucking life, Damon."

"I'm spurting out this same bullshit because you don't fucking get it. You haven't seen your parents in years, Stefan. I know that it might not be technical, but they are your parents like I am your brother and we are your family. I get that you may be insecure—"

I growl, "I'm not insecure. Don't fucking put this shit on me. You're an exact replica of your father. Go to hell." I press the 'end' button and nearly fall to the floor in anger. Bastard.

I reach a hand into my hair and begin to pull, a nervous trait I developed growing up in that household. Taking a calming breath, I finish up my beer and set it down on the table. I need some hard liquor.

I make my way back to the living room to find Nellie curled up and almost sleep. When she sees me coming, licks her lips and slides her hand across the couch to reach for me. My mood heightens immediately and I lift her into my arms and take my seat back onto the couch.

"This is why I don't let you around my family, Nellie. They're assholes," I tell her, leaning down to kiss her forehead. She smiles.

* * *

Kicking the baby bag in front of me, I rock Nellie in my right arm, hold my camera in my left, and make my way up to Elena's apartment. Mini can't wait to see her, and has been practically counting the hours. I swear when I came out the shower she was trying to get to the door. The way they reacted to each other did make me happy, though. Elena was less of a nuisance when she was with Nellie, and Nellie just loved Elena, point blank. This should hopefully make my job a lot easier.

However, I'm not a stupid parent, I wasn't just gonna leave my baby girl without a proper lecture about what to-do and what not to-do.

I've looked up tons and tons of babysitting situations online since I first considered getting one for Nellie. Even though I trusted Elena ( I have no idea why), she still needed a lesson on how to properly care for my baby girl.

I was only an hour and a half early, so she shouldn't be too surprised. Reaching the now familiar door, I give five good raps and wait.

I don't have to for long, because the door swings open, and Elena stands clad in a tiny t shirt that shows just the right amount of stomach and clings to all the right places. I don't know that kind of pants she was wearing, but they were black and stretchy and they should be illegal. After I finish checking her out from head to toe, I smile at her.

"You're early," she states, but she doesn't mind because she immediately takes Nellie into her arms, who is now smiling like she hit the lottery. "Hi, sweet girl," she mumbles into her cheek. I try not to be distracted by that scene even though I feel a tug at my heart.

Clearing my throat I point to the floor. She raises an eyebrow. "It's my baby bag," I explain, "I need to give you all of my Nellie procedures." She smiles at me and shakes her head, stepping back for me to come in.

Pulling my belongings with me, I follow her into her apartment, sitting on her couch. It was almost as comfortable as mine was. She sits down at her loveseat with Mini still in her arms, rocking her softly. "Stefan, I've babysat before."

"But not Nellie. Nellie's different." She rolls her eyes but motions for me to continue. I unzip the baby bag and pull out a piece of paper. "I'm going to need you to sign this." She glares at me and a chill runs through my body.

I slowly slip the paper back into my bag. "It's a good thing you have a nice ass," I mutter. Next, I pull out a couple of Nellie's clothes and diapers. "She just ate peaches so she's more prone to shitting on you. Don't take it personally."

She's barely listening to me, instead she's going batshit over the little outfits. I pull out Mini's pacifier and wave it in her face. "This is your life saver. Don't lose it and always wash it before you put it into her mouth. Also—"

"Stefan, that's enough. I get it. Can you go fix her formula for me?" She gives me a cheeky grin and bites on her lip. Annoyed with this whole thing anyway, I scowl and drop the pacifier on her table, leaning over to grab the bottle.

I walk into her kitchen and spot her microwave and begin to mix her formula up. In the corner, I spot a familiar cage that makes my smile widen. The guinea pig rattled along in it's cage before latching his mouth onto a water bottle.

"You kept him?"

She doesn't even look at my face. "Of course I did. He was a gift. Wanna know his name?" She says sarcastically. I play along, smiling sardonically before placing the bottle in the microwave.

"Jammy?"

"How'd you know?" She gasps, laughing a little.

"Lucky guess."

While the bottle heats up I walk over to the cage and kick the end of it with my foot. "Hey fucker." His beady eyes look up at me, but he looks a little angry so I walk away. Crazy as hell.

The microwave beeps and I pull open the door, grabbing the formula and rushing back to the living room. I take a seat back on the couch and watch Elena smile and play with Mini. Handing her the bottle, I run a hand through my hair.

"How's your boyfriend?"

Elena does a double take before she slowly grins, "Fine. You sure have been asking about him a lot. You interested?"

In you? Maybe. "No I'm not fucking interested. I was just wondering. We're friends, right?"

"Is that what we are?" She says nonchalantly, starting to feed Mini the formula.

I furrow my eyebrows, "I thought so. Don't be mean, Elena. You know, you get away with a lot of things with me. Not many girls can call me an asshole and get away with it."

"Because you love me," she teases, smiling coyly. I shrug.

"I want to fuck you."

She leans over and punches my shoulder. Nellie begins to giggle. "Asshole. Don't curse in front of Nellie." I would call her out for her cursing, but my shoulder hurts. Bad. I can't resist teasing her more, though.

"Elena, have you not heard the comments I've made about your ass? I'm an ass man, after all."

"Okay, _Assman_," she says, smiling at her new nickname. "Don't you have a job to be getting to soon? How about you get out of my apartment?" I look at the clock, and even though I had some time, I needed to stop for gas.

"True."

"And don't you know that I have a boyfriend?" She continues with a taunting smile. I get that irrational anger and stand up to face her. Elena's face flashes at my expression, but relaxes when I give her a light, teasing, grin. I get as close as I can to her, trying my best not to kiss her, because fuck. I want to. She smells like straweberry's and mints and just so damn good that I want to scream. Her breath fans across my face and she closes her eyes and I know that she wants me too.

Good.

"Who says I care?"

I did care, because I'm not an asshole,but I lean back and grin.

"I'll see you and your ass later," I say. I give myself an internal high five for the expression on her face. I lean down and give Mini the biggest kiss I can muster on her tiny cheek. She grins up at me and I smile.

She doesn't look that sad to see me go. "Love you, Mini."

And just because I'm an asshole, I give Elena a kiss on her cheek too.


	6. Just a Little Taste of Pink

**The amount of support I received was amazing and I'm so incredibly lucky to have readers like you. Thank you all so much!**

**Your patience is very much appreciated.**

* * *

**Chapter 6: **Just A Little Taste of Pink

Walking through all the machinery, I reach my hand out to playfully clap Nik as he grabs his lunch. He openly cringes at my cheeriness, but I just grin and nearly skip to the staff refrigerator.

I'd been on cloud nine all week and a bastard like Nik was not going to dull my sparkle.

Ever since that fateful night that I was told I was a father, I'd considered myself pretty unlucky as far as girls went. Of course I didn't resent Mini in any way, but it wasn't easy to flip the switch and go from single and wild to father and responsible. I missed women. I missed the way they felt, the way they spoke and how they touched. I missed every aspect of being with them and it fucking sucked. My hiatus from any sexual encounter was killing me slowly every day. My hand wasn't good enough anymore, especially when I had Elena Gilbert lurking around every corner of my life. The woman was Satan, God, and sunshine wrapped into one girl of absolute fuckery. She was everything I hated and everything that I loved. She was a walking contradiction, a ticking landmine, that I could not and would not get enough of.

She does everything a woman could possibly do for me. We're like a well-oiled machine of sexual tension. She cooks, I do laundry. She watches Mini, I bring home pizza. I tease her about her ass, she hits me. But the one scary and exciting thing that Elena had done for me that surpasses any prior prowess of past women, was that she took away any and all urges or nostalgia of my past ways. She was the whole fucking package and she hadn't even touched my package. That was a turn-on and made me want to kiss her until I couldn't stop. I could no longer deny that every inch of my body craved her. I don't know what that means, or what I could even do about it, but it was a fact now.

As if that realization wasn't enough to have me smiling more, hearing Elena and The Dark Haired Douche argue over the phone was. I don't know what they were talking about, but it was pretty heated.

Elena kept murmuring the name 'Jeremy' and at first I thought that was _his_ name. They were arguing about placement, and Elena was talking about how 'Jeremy' was her obligation, and I swear it sounded like she was going to cry.

And if that prick would have made her cry, I would've made _him_ cry.

But if Elena is anything, she's strong as hell. She didn't cry, from what I could hear, and instead she just got angrier and more defiant. Whatever she was talking about, she didn't appreciate his input because she hung up on him and the phone kept ringing all through dinner.

Because of that argument, I did have a little more bounce in my step. So fucking what. I walk toward our staff table, and see that almost all of the staff took their break twenty minutes early.

Bonnie gives me a cautious glance. "I'm a little worried, Stefan." I shrug but they don't let it go. Of course, Matt has to open his spaced out ass's mouth and laughs obnoxiously as he chews on a sandwich, lettuce falling from his mouth.

He wraps a beefy arm around Katherine and grins. "Our boy has finally settled down." Nik snickers at that and I scowl.

Picking up one of Bonnie's peanuts, I launch it toward his head. My hand eye coordination is admittedly, shitty, so instead it falls into Katherine's hair. She shrieks, stands up, and runs her hand through it like it's a bomb. Bonnie giggles and I try to look as apologetic as possible. I turn to Matt and continue my glare. "Hey asshat, instead of being worried about me and my relationship, why don't you worry about yours on TV." He blanches and the rest of the table watches us, bemused. "Accidentally flipped to the CW last week. Saw the main chick getting laid sans her ex. That ship has sailed."

Matt looks horrified, and then pissed as hell. "You don't know." He picks up his nearly empty cup of water and tosses it back like a shot. "Man," he sputters, "Fuck you."

I laugh as he storms off to refill his cup and plop down next to Bonnie. "Hasn't this week just been fucking fantastic?"

She slowly turns her head and furrows her eyebrows. "It's only Monday."

"I know," I tell her, "It's been a fantastic Monday. Marvelous Monday." Bonnie shakes her head at me and ignores my fuckawesome alliteration.

"I heard you spoke to Damon." My smile falters but doesn't fade.

I clench my teeth at the reminder of the conversation that now seems so long ago. It'd been in my best interest to ignore it and him at all costs. I know they say you shouldn't ignore your problems, but 'they' probably consists of assholes who never had any.

Bubbling beneath the anger of my conversation with him was even surer fury. I swear it's like everyone wants me to be moody today. The fact that one of my best friends still spoke to my brother pissed me off to no end. I was a possessive little fucker, but that wasn't the reason why. Bonnie Bennett, no matter how amazing she is, will forever be hung up on Damon fucking Salvatore. True shit. She could deny it, but she'd been in love with him since she met him. I'd like to say Damon loved her too, but he had such a shitty way of showing love and my Bonnie became a victim to that. She supported him, cared about him, defended him, and saved him from himself time after time. She'd been the connector between the two of us, pushing us together to savor a lost brothership that will never be again. I'm not bitter enough to put my own feelings before hers, but the bottom line is that she deserves to be happy. With or without Damon. Considering that Damon's in a relationship right now, I'd prefer without.

I clear my throat. "Yeah, we had a very enlightening conversation."

She nods and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. "He said you were pretty damn hostile." She murmurs jokingly. I don't laugh. She grimaces and leans toward me. "Look," she whispers, "Stefan, I get it. I really, really, do. But this has gone on for too long and you know that."

Intent on not talking about it, I ignore her and open up a container of pasta that Elena packed for me. Instantly, I'm smiling again and pulling out my plastic fork. I feel Bonnie's stare on me before she relents and sighs. "So, what's that?"

I fork the pasta and shove a piece in my mouth. Chewing happily, I grin. "Elena made it for me."

Nik pulls his head away from his phone he'd been texting on auspiciously. He looks dubiously at us both before he snorts. "Elena?" I nod. He laughs. "The same Elena who had you search her house for a guinea pig? Be sure she didn't poison it."

I roll my eyes even though I know that that is actually a good theory and not beyond her capabilities at all. Poisoned or not, the pasta is fucking amazing. Orgasmic.

_Hm...Orgasms. Orgasms and Elena. Orgasms _with _Elena. Orgasms with Elena and..._Pasta_?_

Nothing sexual about that lastone.

"I can't believe your devil child actually stays quiet for her."

"Mini is pretty good at telling who's an asshole and who's not. She's got you spot on, dick."

Nik snickers and shoves my shoulder, cursing at me. "You're right about one thing. The ass on her, Stef."

I stop smiling. "What? When did you see Elena?"

Nik is not just my best friend, he's my brother. More of a brother than Damon will ever be. This sack of shit has had my back for years. He's seen me at my worst, my best, and my..._worse_. He's seen me take home girls and do body shots in tattoo parlors. He has everything on me and knows me like the back of his hand.

The fact that he's seen Elena worries me. I'm not sure why, but all I know is that I hope he didn't say anything too incriminating.

"I saw her last week. What a girl like that is doing with a bastard like you, is beyond me." He pulls out a cigarette and offers me one. I shake my head and he pulls out a lighter, unaffected. Bonnie stands up, crinkling her nose at the cigarette, and leaves us with a wave following the rest of the staff out. Good thing that Nik and I take our break at the same time, because no one else could bother to smell him smoke.

He lights it up and takes a swift drag. "Tight ass, long brown hair, right?"

My ass. "Back off, asshole."

He grins, and I know he's saying that shit to rile me up more than anything. I pull out a plastic bag that Elena made full of fruit. I slowly start to smile, ignoring Nik's gaze on me. "Looks like the lunches my mom used to pack me," he laughs, nearly dropping his cigarette.

I pop a strawberry into my mouth and grin. "She takes good care of me."

We sit in silence for a bit, me poking at my food and him inhaling his cigarette like it's his lifeline. I can tell something is on his mind, but I don't bother him about it. A couple more tense minutes pass and he takes another drag from his cigarette and then smiles, "I've got some good news, Stef."

Leaning backwards on my chair, I toss my head back away from the smoke and continue munching on my snack. "What?"

"I talked to Elijah the other day, right?" He leans forward, wiping his hand on his jeans, which he usually does when he's excited.

"And?"

"And," he looks down at his jeans with a hidden smile, "he says we can take out a loan."

Fuck.

"We don't have any criminal history and shit. I mean, we're pretty much on the clear. I know you've got Mini, but I told him both of our incomes, and in this moment, we can take out a loan right this fucking second."

I want to smile. I want to jump in the air and run and quit this bullshit job. I want to shake the hell out of Nik and tell him we fucking did it. We fucking did it and I didn't need my 'family' to pitch in or I didn't have to rob a bank. Nik and I have wanted to start our own bar for years. We'd had it planned out for the longest time. Bonnie would be our waitress, Matt would be our bouncer, and more importantly, we would not have to work here. Don't get me wrong, I'm a pretty fucking content man. Sure, I can't splurge and buy all the shit I want, but that didn't mean that I couldn't be a little greedy and want more.

Five years ago, neither of us could get a decent loan out to start it up. We've been saving, hoping to get some good credit and be able to open up. Nik had a degree in business, and I had the experience of making some good ass liquor. The timing was just never right.

But now?

The whole loan process takes a long time. I could hand most of it off to Nik, but ultimately, until it all went through, I wouldn't be at home as much. I'd have the weekends and nights, though, which was a good amount of time. Plus, Elena could watch Mini if I needed it. Could I do it though? It made me nervous as hell already leaving her for the day. Maybe I'm over exaggerating the hours. With Elijah helping us out, he could handle it mostly on his own, and it wouldn't be that much time. And fuck, I'd been a good dad—far better than I imagined. I needed to do something for myself.

No, what I needed to do was talk to Elena. I needed her to sort this shit storm brewing through my skull.

I peer up at him, and slowly smile. "I can talk to Elena about it and try to get some concrete schedule going. Can you give me time to think about it?"

He sighs in relief and grins, "Hell yeah."

* * *

"What the hell are you doing?" I ask as I open the door to my apartment. I drink in the site ahead of me leaving me pissed, confused and a little happy. The usual feelings I get when I'm around Elena.

My baby girl was wrapped around in Elena's arms, wearing a bright white onesie. She was smiling like crazy, her hands muddled in royal blue paint, her feet decked out in green. Elena had slabs of paint on her clothes, but she looked the happiest I'd ever seen her. Thank fuck they weren't on the carpet, but instead they were on this large sheet of paper, foot marks and hand marks all over. It was...creative, I guess. Mini garbles and tries to push her hand to Elena's cheek. She spots me and immediately bounces in Elena's arms, bringing an instant smile to my face.

"We're doing arts and crafts," Elena says blandly, pushing a stray piece of hair back. I slip off my shoes and drop my jacket to the floor.

"I can see that, it looks great."

"Stop lying." She stands up and walks over the sheet of paper toward my TV. No man zone.

"Whoa, woman." She chastises me with her eyes. "I don't care how nice your ass is, but get your paint-y little body away from my TV."

With a roll of her eyes she thrusts Mini toward me. I accept her and lay a kiss on her forehead. "Alright Mini, let's clean you up." Elena rolls up the paper on the floor, and folds it into a square. She begins picking up the paint and brushes while I walk into the kitchen.

"So," I start, "How was today?"

I start the faucet and Mini whimpers. I chuckle as I dip her feet it first, the green falling down the drain. She's immediately distracted by the color and forgets all about her fear of water.

"Fine," Elena says a little too innocently. I know her ticks now, and the girl was up to something.

I begin to lower Nellie's feet into the water, "What?"

"Nothing, Stefan. Hey, when you finish could you come here for a second?"

"Sure thing."

I finish cleaning up all of Nellie's skin, but grab a pink onesie out of the baby bag for her clothes. I remove the white one and drop it in the sink, quickly changing her into the pink. I can tell that Elena had already changed her diaper, which I am extremely grateful for.

When she is all clean and Mini again, I give her another kiss and a tight squeeze. Mini giggles and latches on to my index finger, pulling it into her mouth. "I really hope you don't enjoy sucking stuff this much when your older," I mutter to myself. I head off to my room, and over to the playpen set up in the corner. She doesn't object when I place her in the pen next to her favorite toy. I keep the light on and the door open, so she's still in sight of me and I of her. Just cause I'm anal like that.

I return to the living room to see Elena bent over. I soak that view in for a second before I make myself known. "Alright, what do you have for me, beautiful?"

Elena straightens up and holds a piece of paper facing her in her hands. Motioning to the couch, she sits down and I follow. "This is probably the greatest masterpiece I've ever conducted." I roll my eyes. "Really, and if it doesn't hit your heartstrings, you don't have any."

She flips the paper over and my heartstrings do tug a little. A lot-tle. Mini's foot prints were green and bright in the middle of the paper, all symmetrical and shit. Then both her tiny blue hand prints were on the side. I'm not going to even question how she got her to stay so still for so long, but fuck. She was so tiny and precious. She was so fucking_ mini. _I'm so touched though, and it's not even because of the picture. I mean, yeah, I do appreciate that shit because the few pictures are not enough and she will be getting bigger soon. It's the fact that she'd even done this shit for me, you know? Or for Mini. Elena just looks so damn proud, and I've never met anyone like that. The person who just _does_ things for people and doesn't expect shit in return. She makes me lunches, she babysits Mini, she fucking makes foot print portraits for me and I give her nothing. It's endearing, sad, and also gives me a good dose of hope I think that I need.

My whole life was spent getting myself out of this emotional debt. I had always considered myself a burden and it was hard for me to let people do things for me, ever. When my father let me go, I know it was because he resented me, and because I was a burden in his life. Even at the adoption center, when shit had gone awry and it wasn't the cause of me, I _still _thought I was a burden. A waste of space. Then when Damon had come up to me in the center and pointed me out to his parents, all I could think about was how much of burden I was going to be for them. I fucking was, too. That's why I tried to go to college. I wanted to make them happy and think that adopting me wasn't a mistake. When I dropped out, I gave up on that path of righteousness. What better way to pay them back then to leave them alone? I got a job and my own apartment and my own friends. I'm paying off a debt to the world every fucking day. I needed to do things for myself. I didn't need my parents or my brother to bail me out again. The only burden I'd be to anyone was myself.

A feeling starts to erupt in my chest again when I look at her, and it's the same kind of burn as it was weeks ago. It's an all consuming feeling that is scary as shit but feels fantastic. I really want to kiss her. I think that's what that feeling is. Her lips are so full and red and they're practically begging me like they do every day. Even though it's wrong to even consider, I wonder what they'd feel like against mine. I wonder if they felt as soft as they looked. I wonder what her hair would feel like between my fingers, what her hands would feel like around me. I wonder what she would feel like on top of me, beneath me, beside me, in front of me and all around me. I wonder all of this so fast and my head starts to spin and my body tenses because I fucking need to know. I want to know.

Her eyes darken, and I wonder now if she feels it too. I slide one of my hands from my thigh to the paper. I grasp it, and without looking at it, I place it on the coffee table beside me. Her eyes follow the paper, and then meet mine, a haze of wonder and want. My same hand reaches up until I'm cupping her face, rubbing the apple of her cheek with my thumb. She's so fucking soft and real and just...perfect. I feel her lean into my touch, and close her eyes and then I have to kiss her because she's asking me to. I feel it. My breathing labors and I lean toward her slowly. We're like magnets, and something's pulling me closer and closer. I swallow hard and bite on my lip.

"Can I?..." I croak quietly, my lips almost on hers. She swallows too and I see the tiniest tilt of her head that says I'm driving her as crazy as she's driving me. That's all I need.

Gently but surely, I place my lips against hers, and the ache I feel fades into the most peaceful and euphoric feeling I've ever felt in my life. Her lips are so fucking perfect against mine, and it feels so right. Her hands adjust so they're wrapped around me, and I have never been so turned on and so gone from a kiss before. When she opens her mouth to me, I'm lost and found all at once and I know, deep down, she has me hook, line and sinker. Could this be the girl I spend the rest of my life with? Who fucking knows. Would I mind if she was? If she keeps kissing me like this every day, she could have me. Our tongues tangle and lap at each other and we turn hungry and thirsty for each other. It's almost like I can't get enough, and I can't. She holds me tightly and hitches her leg across mine and I groan because I might just explode. She pushes herself against me, gripping any part of my body she can reach, specifically my hair that she pulls over and over again. As my hand strokes the small of her back, almost grabbing the Holy Grail, the asses of all asses, the remote to the television collapses onto the floor and Elena freezes on top of me.

Fuck.

She pulls herself back and looks me in the eyes, panicked and shocked as hell. I've never seen her so flustered before. She licks her lips and sits up, facing away from me.

"Elena?"

"I should probably go. I've got to work tomorrow," her voice sounds a little off, but I get that she's freaked out even if I don't want her to be. She bends over to grab her jacket and purse and then slips on some moccasins she wore over. I stand up to see her out, but she opens the door on her own and leaves. Just like that.

I groan and toss my head back against the couch, cursing who ever even made remote controls. Though Elena was acting not at all like the woman I'd grown to know and like, she still drove me insane with her rather mixed signals.

And that kiss had definitely not got her out of my system. It made me want her even more.

"Fuck my fucking life," I growl again, picking up the remote as I stand. Heading back to my room, I remove my shirt and toss it on my bed. Mini, still wide awake, stares up at me with wide open cerulean eyes.

"Yeah, I know Mini. I know."

I walk to the bathroom and shut the door, removing my pants and noticing just how bad my erection had gotten.

_I guess I need a cold shower._

I turned the shower on and jumped in, letting the warmth settle on me for a moment. I never even got to ask Elena about this whole bar thing with Nik. Or touch her ass. Shoving those thoughts to the back of my mind, I squirt some shampoo in my hair, scrubbing it in like it would scrub away all my thoughts. I continue washing up, spending extra time in when I turn the faucet to cold, which I hiss at in discomfort.

I brush my teeth in the shower to waste some time, and when my erection is officially killed, I grab my towel and step out, practically shivering. This shit should be illegal.

With one hand on my towel and the other on my face, I step in front of the mirror and grab my washcloth.

Then I fucking freeze.

Then I scream.

Then Mini screams from outside.

My fucking hair. My hair is fucking _pink_. Fucking pink. I breathe heavily and growl.

"Elena."

I flip my hair over a couple times in the mirror, trying to make sure my eyes weren't playing any tricks on me. I scowl in the mirror and my heart starts pounding. My hair is a very particular color. If this is permanent I might throw her off a cliff. Or myself.

My hair was a very prestigious blonde. It cannot be bought in a fucking can. I refuse to dye my hair strawberry blonde after this. It does not and will fucking not suffice. But I also can't just walk around my work looking like this.

Or meet with a loaner like this.

I groan and tighten my towel, leaning back into the shower. I yank the stupid shampoo off the rack, and I immediately know it's been tampered with. I slam it on the shower floor and march over to the bathroom cabinet, yanking it open. Pulling out a shower cap that's usually reserved for my over night deep conditioner, I tighten it on my head and proceed to leave the bathroom.

Not bothering to look at my traitor child who's laughing and bouncing up and down in her pen, I march out of my bedroom and out to the front door.

I will not be made a mockery of. I will not. I won't.

I make sure that my towel is perfectly secured, and swing the front door open, only to meet the eyes of my fifty year old neighbor. I really do not have time for his shit today, too. What happened to my marvelous Monday? He glares at me as he unlocks the door to his apartment and shakes his head.

"Not my fault," I snap as he slams the door. Fuck him. Fuck this. I shut my door behind me, hoping that no pedophile goes in to steal Mini and sprint down the hallway and up the now familiar set of stairs. I don't even care if someone could get a good view of my ass.

Just wait until I get my hands on her. This has gone too fucking far. I stomp all the way down to her door, and immediately the door swings open like she was waiting for me.

Fuck her for looking so fuckable when I'm angry. She looks me up and down, taking special interest in my abs and I would be smirking if I wasn't so damn pissed. When she sees the shower cap on my head, she loses it, hard giggles racking her body. I clench my hand that's holding my towel together and growl at her.

"Really Elena? I confided in you. I trusted you. You knew that I cared about my hair and you fucking ruined it." I stage whisper, so we don't grow an audience. She laughs harder and snorts.

"Yeah right, chill."

"Chill?" I nearly shriek. "My hair is fucking pink!" She bends over, holding her stomach, pointing at my shower cap. "Look, just tell me if it's permanent."  
She controls herself for a second and then shrugs. "I don't know if I can do that, Stefan."

I clench my teeth together and then decide on another tactic. "Is this because you kissed me?"

Her face drops. "_I_ didn't kiss _you_, _you_ kissed _me_."

I smile. "It's okay, I get it. I have a pretty nice body. Here feel." I grab her hand with my free hand and place it on my stomach. Her eyes glaze over for a moment and then she glares, removing her hand.

"I don't care about your body. You couldn't help yourself, and so you kissed me, Stefan. No big deal."

"I didn't though," I egg her on, "You leaned forward and put your hand on my crotch. I am a man."

She opens her mouth once and then shuts it just as quickly. "Now you're fucking lying."

God, I liked a woman who could give good F bombs. "I'm not. It's okay, Elena. Feel free to kiss me anytime. These lips are yours."

"Mm," she sarcastically moans, but the sound still goes straight to my dick. "As long as I get to run my hands through your fire fuchsia colored hair."

"Well, you did like running my hand through my hair about 15 minutes ago. Around the same time your were grinding your little body on top of me." She fumes. "That, my dear, was not a lie. You know that."

"Goodbye, Stefan," she says, glaring at me. I step inside so she can't close the door and she sighs, picking at her nails. "Are you leaving?"

"Why the rush?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but my friend Caroline is coming over and she's a little wary of the color pink."

"Ah, I see. That could be easily fixed if you'd just tell me how to fix this shit."

"Where's the fun in that?" I smile at her devious expression and shake my head.

"You're fucking nuts."

"Ditto."

I step out the door, but keep one hand on her waist, that she eyes with a warning look. "Stefan."

I ignore her and lean against her door frame, enamored by how fucking hot she is and almost forgetting why I came down here angry in the first place. "You might be crazy, but you give a good kiss, you know that right?"

"I've been told."

"Good. Talents like that deserve a standing ovation." I remove my hand and give a tip of my head. "Good night Elena."

"Good night Stefan." I turn to walk up the stairs, happy and pink.

* * *

_What the hell is that ringing noise?_

I flip over onto my side and groan, tossing my arm over my face to block that shit out. It doesn't stop. I open my eyes and push myself up, sleep be damned. I peek over in Mini's crib, who's sleeping softly like nothing was happening. Lucky kid. I adjust my shower cap that still resides on my head as I stumble along in the darkness, following the familiar ring to the kitchen. My phone is there, vibrating like crazy on the counter, seemingly never-ending.

I grab my phone off the counter and read the caller I.D, half interested and half pissed. I flick the phone open and sigh.

"Someone better be dead."

"Stefan," Bonnie starts, her voice trembling. I'm immediately alert and fucking scared, because Bonnie fucking Bennett does not tremble. Ever. My heart starts hammering in overtime and I put my head in my hands.

"What's going on?" I say softly, listening to her pant gently. It only occurs to me then that she's been crying, and my blood runs cold. I swear to God if Damon did anything to make her cry I will personally beat the shit out of him. "Did Damon do something?"

Hesitantly, but also pissed at my accusations, she responds. "No, Stefan," she sniffles gently. "He didn't do anything. Damon didn't call you because of your parents, Stefan. He didn't call you to be a dick. You've got this grudge held over him, and you won't even give him a chance to fucking explain, and I feel so helpless because I can't do anything to help."

Figuring she's talking about my brother and I's relationship, I close my eyes as relief spreads my body followed by pure irritation. "It's two in the morning, Bennett. Can we talk about this tomorrow. I'm more interested in getting some sleep." Is she drunk?

It's quiet on the line and I think that she hung up on me until I hear her soft breathing.

"Stefan, something's wrong."

I slam my hand down on the counter, "What's wrong?"

"Damon's in trouble."


	7. Call on Me

**The last chapter was such a blast to write. Man.**

**Thanks for all the love and patience. Love you guys.**

Chapter 7: Call on Me

Jail smelled like ass. Plain and simple.

When you think about it, it makes sense, too. You know, with everyone being everyone's bitch and whatnot.

The whole layout of the place was creepy as hell. First you open these double doors to get inside, and there's this tiny 4x4 room that you pass through that's decorated all pretty and happy-like. Then there's this long ass hallway. Metal on the walls, metal beneath your feet. I'd be lying to say this wasn't my first time walking down this hallway.

Finally, you reach a receptionist desk at which point a lady usually comes out and asks you all sorts of questions, but the bottom line is that she wants to know if you've brought drugs, explosives, or both. Then you sit in the chairs-feel free to skip that step-and then after waiting seemingly for days, the lady will help you.

In my case, this was much harder.

"Damon Salvatore...I'm his brother?" I flinch at her gaze but try to hold my own.

"Stefan Salvatore?"

"Yes."

"Only his lawyer is allowed in the cell."

I sigh. "Fucking great," she gives me a pointed glance, "Can't you hook us up to those telephone things?"

"I need to see your license."

I mutter some expletives under my mouth and pull my wallet out. Bright blue eyes meet mine as I open it, and I stroke my pinky over the wrinkled picture of my daughter.

Fuck, I missed her.

I pull my license out and hand it to the lady. She inspects it quickly, but her eyes wander openly to the picture of my Mini.

"Is that your daughter? She looks just like you. So adorable."

I smile proudly and nod, inching the photo even closer for her to look. "That she is."

She types some bullshit into the computer and hands me a green pass along with my license. "It's booth 69."

I try not to laugh and she scowls at me.

When I see Damon, I laugh even harder. His jet black hair had become overgrown and he was sporting some serious stubble, which I know he wasn't a fan of. As if he could read my thoughts, his hand grazes over his jaw and he juts it out in a defiant pout. He glares at me as I doubled over, but I could see the hint of a smile forming.

I pull out the chair and slouch down in it, only reaching my lazy right arm out to grab the phone. A burly guard in the corner watches me carefully, so I try to look as innocent as possible. He eyes me for a moment, and then returns his attention to the door.

"Hey."

"Bonnie told you I was here," he states. He runs a hand through his hair, and a jolt of familiarity runs through me.

I shrug and he continues to watch me curiously. "You actually came? I'm surprised."

"I can leave," I say with a smirk.

His blue eyes widen in alarm. "Stefan, don't."

"Then quit fucking with me." He gives me a nod and I resume. "Why the hell are you in jail?"

"Why the hell do you have a baby?" He retorts.

I freeze, my insides shrivelling up. "Bonnie."

He smiles crookedly,"What can I say? My girl has a big mouth."

I squint my eyes and lean back in my chair, pressing my lips into a tight line. He mimics my motions. "What?"

"Don't call her that when you don't mean it."

He rubs at his eyebrows in fatigue, another action that brings me back to our blue childhood room, fighting over the bunk beds. "Are we still here?"

I roll my eyes at his question. "We never fucking left 'here', Damon. Andie pulls some shit and now you want to hop into bed with Bon? You're such a shit head."

"I've always loved Bonnie," he says all nonchalantly. God he pissed me off sometimes. I lean back and my head begins to nod on it's own accord, sarcastically.

"That was never enough though, was it?"

He regards me for a moment, silent. Good. The bastard just did shit to get his way all of the time like playing Bonnie like a fiddle. Though I was never a saint, I was always clear about my intentions with women. I never led them on.

Damon leans forward and squints his eyes at me, tilting his head to one side.

"Since you seem to love pointing out my mistakes, let's talk about yours."

"My daughter isn't a fucking mistake, Damon." My anger rises.

He chuckles and leans back, folding his arms across his chest. We stand in an impasse until I break. Because let's be honest, I'm tired as hell, and I miss my daughter and my little psycho. The last place that I wanted to be was here, but I care about my best friend enough to man up and be here for this assfuck. I was trying to be a good guy.

"You know what? When Bonnie called me last night, I thought that maybe this experience changed you. I thought maybe you learned something. But you're still the same self centered prick you were growing up."

"And you're still insecure and bitter," he says sardonically. "I guess people don't change."

"Call me when you actually want my help."

I fucking hate jails.

* * *

I flick a piece of popcorn at Nellie and she squeals happily.

She's such a freak.

"Oooh, naaaaah!"

I shake my head at her as she begins to slightly bounce in her seat. "Someone's in a good mood today, huh?"

She mashes her lips together and slobbers all over her shirt. How the hell do babies have that much spit?

They're just so...inhuman.

They shit more than any human being is capable of, they cry all night and half the day but still manage to make little noises and piss you off, and in Mini's case, she was so damn little. Seriously.

I knew she was going to be a shortie when she got older because Lexi was, and, according to her pediatrician, Mini was going to experience the same fate. Hopefully boys of her generation won't want a short, tiny, girl.

Fuck. Boys.

I can imagine it now. My Mini getting on the back of some tatted up punk's Harley. I growl.

"You're not dating until you're thirty," I tell her with a scowl. Mini turns her face up to me and frowns.

"I know it seems rash," I rub her little arm,"but I know what boys think about. It's icky."

She thinks about it for a second and then puffs her cheeks out. "Iffffy..."

"You can try and say 'icky', but not 'daddy'?"

She giggles at my expression and puts one of her hands in the air that I immediately grab with my own. "Iffffffffy..."

"Icky. Say 'Daddy is icky'."

She giggles louder. "Iffffy iffy ifffff!"

"You're useless!" I lean in and blow a raspberry on her cheek and she leans in to me, smiling and laughing.

Elena told me to savor moments like this when she was young because time would move so fast. I'm almost certain she'd gotten the line from a movie, but I accepted and appreciated it all the same.

All this thinking of Mini growing older was making my chest and head hurt. I wonder how much she'd miss out on with no mother figure. I wonder if she'd someday accept the woman in my life as her mother. I wonder if she'd remember her real one. I wonder if she'd even fucking want to.

Making decisions like this was probably the hardest part of parenting.

And you'll get there when you get there.

I subconsciously run a hand through my fading pink hair. The more I washed, the more it came out. I'm resorting to hats until the hue is gone, however. A big part of me liked it though. Not because of the color, but because every time I saw it, I was brought back to my couch with Elena on my lap.

Good fucking times.

Mini coos and my mind drifts back to her.

I promised myself that if I were to have a kid, I would give them the world. They deserved to have a family of people who loved them, and I knew having just me wasn't enough for my baby. She would eventually crave a mother.

"Did you buy that banana food on sale at the store?"

No. "Yes."

"Where is it?" Elena asks, pulling Mini into her arms.

At the store. "I don't know. I swear I put it in the cabinet."

I yank a can of pop off the counter and chug, watching her ass as she walked. If I had any way with words, I could adequately name it. However, being as inept as I am, I couldn't find a word to give the glorious ass justice. Instead, I paid my respect by keeping a watchful eye and trying to stroke it.

"Stefan if you don't go and get the baby food from the store, I will kick your ass," she says with a snarl. My balls cower.

I pull myself from the couch and walk to her in the kitchen. "What's the big deal? Why don't you just use the mashed peaches?"

"She doesn't like those," she utters. She pushes her hip to the side with a firm hand gripping it.

I turn my head indignantly, "She likes them when I give them to her."

"Shut up. Hey, what were you doing today that you couldn't go to work?"

I debate whether or not I should tell her before deciding that if she was going to get involved in my shit, she better get all of it. Go big or go home.

"My brother Damon. He's in jail."

Her eyes widen. "What for?"

I bite my lip and shake my head. "Rape."

Her eyebrows shoot up and I immediately grab her arm. "No, he didn't do it. Damon's an asshole, but he isn't a fucking rapist."

She glances at me before turning her gaze to Nellie. When she looks at me again, her eyes are softened and the bitingly sarcastic girl disappears for a moment.

"I'm sorry, Stefan," she says earnestly.

"Me too, and I'd rather you be sorry for dying my hair pink, not for being wary of my brother." She giggles and I have to grab my crotch to make sure my balls are still there, because every time she laughs, I lose it.

"I think your hair looks fine," she teases, pointing at the pale pink strands in question.

"You would." I lean closer to her, desperately wanting to feel her lips against mine again. Since we kissed two nights ago, all I could think about was getting another taste of her. And maybe my first fistful of her luscious ass.

Dear God.

"Iffffyyy..." My baby girl croons from Elena's arms. I chuckle and give her my index finger to suck on.

"You're right darling, your daddy is icky," Elena laughs. I glare at her.

"Don't encourage her."

Mini giggles around my finger and I pull it away before she tries to swallow me whole.

Elena tucks her away in her seat, laying a kiss on her head. It's so weird how she is with her. With me, she's always so hostile and cold. But with Nellie, she literally melts. She holds her like she's the most precious thing in the world. She's so...motherly.

Drop that fucking thought, Stefan Salvatore.

Think about important things. Like how you're going to convince this woman to do two things she'd probably knife you for even suggesting.

I clear my throat and bite my lower lip. "Hey, Elena?"

"What do you want?" I cringe at her tone and wring my left hand.

"What exactly is your work schedule like?"

She looks at me curiously before flicking a piece of hair behind her ear. "The system is really cool, actually. It's entirely dependent upon how many clients I'm working with. Lately, my hours have been low because most of my clients are in medical care for the week. Even then, I like to work with them nights. Good thing I'm on salary."

I let out a forced laugh and she side eyes me for a few beats.

"Stefan, what do you want?"

I ignore her. "Did you always want to help addicts?"

She shrugs and sits down at the table beside Nellie and I, scooping some mashed potatoes on my plate. "No."

Well then.

"So what did you want to be?"

She lets out an exasperated sigh. "A teacher. Then I realized that I hate having to explain myself more than once," she says pointedly.

I cringe and start to push my food around on my plate.

"If you have something to say, say it," I hear the smile in her voice which loosens me up a bit.

"I don't know why I'm nervous about this. I really shouldn't be nervous about it, because I know you'll be fine with it." I fidget with my hands and adjust the napkin beside me. It gives me something to do.

"You're fine with anything. I mean, you cook, you clean up after Nellie and, admittedly, me. You're like this fucking angel sent from God to make sure I don't ruin Nellie's life and I never really said thank you for it so thank you. And these are the best fucking mashed potatoes ever."

I clear my throat and fidget even more. "I think that's why I am afraid to ask for things from you. You do so much already. I don't want to make it seem like I'm using you or some shit, you know? Because if my Mini never existed I'd still think you'd have a fantastic ass and...I don't know. We're best friends."

She scoffs. "You are not my best friend."

I furrow my eyebrows at her, finally meeting her gaze. "Then who is?"

"Caroline Forbes."

"Bullshit."

"She is! Just like Nik is yours."

"I'm not claiming that fucker. I'd much rather claim you, but I won't delve any deeper into that. Or you, for that matter." She scowls at me and I grin. "Seriously, we spend every waking moment together."

"You can't convince me that we're best friends," she shoves a forkful of meat in her mouth.

"Who else knows that you sleep with your socks on? Or that you pour your milk first, then your cereal? Which is the weirdest fucking thing ever. Or, how about how when you read, how you always make facial expressions to match the mood. Or that when you watch those commercials about the stray puppies, you cry."

She slams her fist down on the table and glares at me. "I was not crying. There was something in my eye. By the way, that is not friendship, that is stalking."

I frown.

"So what do you want to ask me?"

I swallow my forkful of mashed potatoes and sigh. "Okay, so you know, I always wanted to open a bar. But, due to obvious reasons, I couldn't exactly ask for a loan from the bank to buy a place. And now Nik told me that we can, and I hate asking you this, but I don't know how hectic this will be opening it up. If I open one up. Do you think I should open one up?"

She blinks at me and then nods. "If that's what you want to do, Stefan. You know that Nellie isnt a problem. I love hanging out with her."

"I know, but like I said, you don't have to." I swallow again and wring my hands. "Like if you ever want to go out with your boyfriend sometime, feel free to tell me to fuck off."

She doesn't answer, and I don't bother to look at her expression. I bite into the amazing chicken she whipped up spur of the moment and chew thoughtfully, only glancing up to get napkins. We sit like this for a good ten minutes before she speaks.

"My boyfriend?"

Talk about a delayed response.

"You know...the Dark Haired Douche," I joke carefully, feeling for her reaction. To my surprise, she laughs and shakes her head.

"Who are you talking about?"

I put my fork down and lick my lips, "I saw you with him awhile ago and he was walking you out of the building. Kind of around the time we first met. Does he treat you right?"

Her eyes light with realization and then she nods. "Yeah, he does."

"That's all that matters."

"Stefan?"

"Hmm?"

"He isn't my boyfriend."

"Oh."

I look up at her the same time she looks at me and we both smile. My God she's so gorgeous and perfect and I have the strongest urge to lean across the table and kiss the shit out of her.

Suddenly, her eyes furrow and she glares at me. "You think I would kiss you if I had a boyfriend?"

I shrug, which apparently puts me in a deeper hole than I am already. She crosses her legs, her gaze unwavering. "I didn't know if maybe...I don't know."

"I don't cheat, Stefan. I'm not a whore."

"The fuck? I didn't say that," I say. I grab my dishes and hers, walking toward the sink. I really didn't want to fight with her. In fact, due to the fact that she was single, there were a shitload of things I'd rather be doing.

"Well you implied it, and that's shitty."

"You know I don't think of you like that. You're the most respectable chick that I know," I plead, dropping the plates in the sink.

"Treat me like it then." She reaches forward to grab my arm and twirls me around so I meet her chocolate brown eyes. "I don't know what you think of me, but know we wouldn't have kissed if I were seeing somebody else."

I rest my forehead against hers and push my nose to hers, which makes her giggle softly. "I think you're amazing. And I'm an asshole, so if you want to continue this, you should get used to the shit that comes out of my mouth sometimes."

She hums and pulls away. "And what is this?"

"Whatever you want it to be." I rub up and down her arm and she leans into me. My hands circle around to her back and I trail them down to her waist, hovering over the Holy Grail.

This is fucking it, guys.

I'm about to touch the ass of all asses.

The ass of my dreams every single night since the moment I met this woman.

It is about to go down.

I nearly whimper when she pulls away, my hands not even grazing their destination. Fuck my life.

"I'm surprised I haven't received your retaliation from me getting your hair."

I smirk to myself but outwardly shrug. "Hasn't crossed my mind."

She eyes me cautiously and releases me. "I should get going. I have to meet my best friend at her house tonight."

"You're staying over tonight? That's great. I'd love to have you in my bed, Gilbert."

She ignores me, "I'll see Nellie and you tomorrow. Pick up the damn food, Stefan."

I kiss her cheek and nod. "Scouts honor."

She playfully wipes the cheek and I bare my teeth at her. "Cut that out."

She leans down and gives Mini a big kiss and I'm instantly jealous. I think my daughter knows it because she starts giggling like crazy at me. I glare at her in return.

I follow Elena out to the front door and lean against it carefully. "Do I get a goodnight kiss?"

"Nope."

I nod. "Fair enough. I'll see you, and your ass, later."

"Good deal."

As soon as the door shuts, I open it a good ten seconds later.

I trail down the hallway, following Elena's footsteps verbatim. I swear she sees me, but if she does, she doesn't do or say anything. Instead, she walks mindlessly to her room. When she's inside, I stand by the side of her door, waiting.

I almost think that my plan didn't work until I hear her familiar scream.

"My...are you FUCKING KIDDING ME? Are those frogs?"

I start shaking with suppressed laughter until the door swings open.

"You!" She growls out at me, shaking in anger.

I laugh harder, lifting my finger to silence her for a moment.

When I get myself together, I lean forward and place a gentle but purposeful kiss on her lips.

"See you tomorrow, Elena."


	8. Phonecall

**...****How ****are ****you ****all ****feeling****?**

**Hmph ****at ****that ****season ****five ****finale****. ****Just ****hmph****.**

**There****'****s ****some ****progress ****here****. ****Major ****progress****.**

**All ****mistakes ****are ****mine****, ****yo****!**

* * *

"Dude," Matt drawls out, sinking further into my couch. "She's like a little monster!"

I glare at him and pick up a pink stuffed flamingo to launch at his head. He sees my intention and cowers back.

"Not in a bad way. A cute monster. Hey, wanna go see Iron Man 3?" I roll my eyes at him and stick a forkful of pasta in my mouth.

Katherine and Matt had a falling out and Matt had started crashing with her as soon as their relationship started. Once she beat the shit out of him with a four inch pump, he became homeless. I, being the beautiful and loving bastard that I am, took pity on my old friend and allowed him into my home with welcome arms. My fucking bad.

I didn't know how much of a slob the freak was, otherwise I would've let him live in a garbage can. He eats all of my food and all the food Elena used to make for only me. In fact, Elena loves the prick. She said he had a baby face or some shit.

I don't need that because I'm a _man_. I have a _man__'__s_ face.

Usually, I would walk into the break room at lunch and be the envy of the room. While everyone else would pull out their pathetic fast food lunches, I would unravel a nice home cooked meal. More often than not, they were delicious leftovers.

But now?

Matt fucking Donovan would be opening the same damn meal right next to me.

Maybe I was being unreasonably jealous, seeing as there was absolutely no way Elena would go for him. From my experience, I knew that the meaner she was to you, the more she liked you. She treated me like shit everyday and so I know that she cares about me more. But even still, I hated having to share her. Especially with Matt.

"So," I say slowly. "Have you been looking for a place?"

He chews the rest of his burger and finally tears his eyes from the television screen. "Uh, not really," he says disinterestedly.

I try not to growl at him as I stand and pull Nellie from her chair to the crease of my arm. "I'm gonna tuck her in for the night."

He nods but doesn't answer me. Then he reaches below him to a cooler and pulls out _my _beer as if it's his own. I scowl at him and stomp my way to Nellie's room.

Mini watched, bemused, as I set up her sleeping center.

"He's such a fucking prick." Her tiny eyes widen into saucers. I snicker at her expression and then lean into her, giving her a big kiss on her cheek. "Don't tell Elena I said that."

I flip on the night light and then turn off the room light, flashing my face to Mini so she doesn't get scared. I pull her into my arms and sit down in the chair by her cradle.

"You like Elena, don't you?" She hums in my arms and I hold her tightly. "My girlfriend," I say, trying out the word. Then I freeze.

"I mean, we aren't official or anything, but we kissed and she isn't seeing anyone. I think we may be dating now. Is it safe to say we're dating?"

She blinks innocently at me and then burrows her head into my chest. "It's okay, you don't have to answer. But should I bring it up with her? Or is that too forward? Who the hell am I kidding, I _am _forward."

She sniffles twice and I smile at her now closing eyes, laying two soft kisses on each lid. "Alright little thing, you're obviously too tired to talk. Tomorrow, we'll talk some more before I go to work. What do you think of that?"

She makes a soft humming sound again and I give her a final kiss before relinquishing her to her cradle. After her blanket is securely around her and _I _check for monsters lurking under the bed, I pull out the only book Elena ever reads her.

It's prone to knock her out, but I've never been much of a reader.

I clear my throat and try my best to whisper so that Matt Dumbfuck Donovan doesn't hear me. I lean my chair against the cradle and look into Mini's tired blue eyes.

"In the great green room, there was a telephone and a red balloon."

Her eyes flutter but they don't close.

"And a picture of the cow jumping over the moon. And there were three little bears sitting on chairs, and two little kittens and a pair of mittens," I continue softly. No dice.

"She likes it when you skip straight to the goodnights." I whirl around so fast that my body swivels off of the rocking chair and I land with a thick thud onto my back. I groan from the pain and hear two distinct giggles from around me.

"Guys, seriously?" I hear Matt yell loudly. "In front of the kid?"

I ignore him and slowly raise myself back to my feet. Mini kicks her feet up and down, clasping her hands together. I feel Elena walking closer into the room until her hand is laying on top of my shoulder, igniting the familiar electricity I always feel when I'm around her.

"Nice spill," she sarcastically states, giggling.

"Whatever," I snappily remark. "And if you know how to get her to sleep so well, then why don't you do it?"

She rests her other hand on my other shoulder and presses down gently. "I want _you _to do it."

I flush a little and realize how fucking ridiculous it is to be reading "Goodnight Moon" in front of my daughter and maybe-sort of-kind of girlfriend.

I cringe as I flip a couple of pages and resume. "Alright. Um. Goodnight, room. Goodnight, moon. Goodnight, cow jumping over the moon. Goodnight, light and the red balloon. Goodnight, bears. Good night, chairs. Good night, kittens. Good night, mittens."

I reach around and scratch the back of my neck as Elena moves her ass in front of me to lean down and rub Mini's tummy. Goodnight Mini, hello ass.

With new found amusement, I chuckle the next few lines. "Good night, clocks. Good night, socks. Goodnight, little house. Goodnight, mouse. Good night, comb. Good night, brush.

Goodnight, nobody. Goodnight, mush. Good night to the old lady whispering, "Hush." Good night, stars. Good night, air. Goodnight, noises everywhere."

Elena and I speak the last few lines in unison. I hear soft Mini snores and let out a sigh of relief. "Thank God."

I hear her hum in agreement and cut off the nightlight beside me. I slam the god forsaken book closed and drop into the floor at which Elena promptly rolls her eyes at. She bends over and grabs the book and then hits me with it on the back of my head. I couldn't even find it in myself to care.

"How'd you get in here?" I stage whispered. She shrugged and then pointed toward the door.

"Matt. I asked him if he could go watch Jammy for me."

I nod. "Matt loves animals."

She brings her hands together around her stomach and fidgets. "I was actually hoping that maybe we could talk."

"That sounds serious," I start casually while my heart nearly thumps out of my chest. She shrugs again and walks out of Mini's bedroom. I follow in tow like a lost puppy dog. I wonder if that will always be the dynamic of our relationship.

Probably.

She walks toward the couch and moves some of the trails of Donovan off of the couch and crosses one of her legs over the other. I notice that she's wearing shorts and thank the lord for calves like those.

She flickers her gaze from me to the floor quickly. "I don't know how to say this."

I feel my heart drop. "Say what?"

She finally meets my eyes and then sighs and motions to the couch. "I'd rather stand," I say indignantly.

"Okay," she agrees, sitting down instead. "So, I think we need to clear the air."

"My air is clean," I assure her nervously. "I mean, you see my kid, my little messy apartment and lack of all around skills everyday."

She stares at me for a beat and then her eyes soften. "Stop deflecting my insulting yourself."

"I'm not insulting myself, Elena. I'm telling the truth."

Her eyes widen at my snappy tone and then turn into two prominent slits. "Stop it."

"No," I say, shrugging. "Hey look, you want to clear the air? Fine, lets clear it. I'm a punk, with no family or future. I have friends, but my time used to be spent picking up women and chilling around my shitty apartment with my minimum wage pay."

She opens up her mouth to speak, but I quickly start again. "That doesn't bother me, but I'm not boyfriend material, and having you around has proven that point. All you do is shit for me. Buying Nellie stuff, watching her, making me food and, hell, watching _me_. You know, I really like you, which I don't even know why because you're fucking insane. But you're the good kind, and I like that you drive me nuts and that you do this stuff for me and I don't deserve an ounce of it." I feel her hand move up again in front of me.

She shakes her head at me as I speak and I grow desperate. "But I want to be with you. For the first time I want to actually be with someone, and not just because of your fantastic ass. I promise that I'll be better. I'll buy the things that you ask me to and I'll be good for you. I promise you that I'll..."

But her head shaking grows faster and angrier and she places her palm against my chest, right above my heart. "You don't need to be anything for me that you already aren't, Stefan."

I gaze up at her, bewildered. "You are a punk and you did a lot of bad things in your past, I'm sure. But you stepped up, and you took responsibility for a life and do your best everyday to make it work. You're trying, and that's all you need to do."

"I've spent a long time focusing on myself and feeling lonely inside. You make me feel better, Stefan. You and Nellie both. I'm proud of you, and I'd love to go out with you sometime."

I crush my lips to hers to seal the deal and to make sure that she didn't go back on her words. I was the happiest fucker in the world, and nothing could make this moment any better. Except...

I slid my hands down to her waist, and her smooth lips smiled against mine as she giggled into my mouth. I smiled back and finally.

I was home.

And my God, was it magical.

_This _was the most spectacular place on earth, Mr. Walt, and I never want to leave. Ever.

I squeezed it once and she squealed into my mouth which made me smile even harder. One of her hands traveled to my faded pink hair and squeezed in retaliation. But then she bit my lip. Hard.

I recoil and hit my shin on the coffee table, and then bring it up to cradle in my arms. "Holy shit, why the fuck did you do that?"

"I'm _not _insane."

I pause and then laugh incredulously, walking toward her again and placing my hands on my new favorite spot. "Of course you aren't," I say sarcastically.

"Shut up," she laughs softly.

I playfully lean in and nibble on her cheek, savoring how comfortable I could be with her. "I bet you could find a way to shut me up."

She shoves me away and I push her down on the couch and tackle after her. "Let's sleep."

"Uh, no. Matt is here." I groan and stick my neck into the curve of her neck, absorbing her strawberry scent.

"Don't remind me."

"He is so adorable!" I roll my eyes at her comment and mock her silently as I roll onto my back, feeling the fatigue growing. I pull her on top of me, feeling like I was in a dream, her body nestled into mine.

I hug her tightly and smile. "Fine, let's take a nap."

"Nope."

"Power nap?"

"Nope."

"5 minutes? I'll be good."

"Stefan, your hands are groping my ass."

"Shh. I'm sleeping."

* * *

"Sign here."

"Fuck me. Wrong line."

"Don't get frustrated," Elijah teases lightly, flipping through a binder. "Just fill those out and I'll get some more for Nik."

I scrawl my initials a good five times on one sheet and hand them back to him with a scowl. "I hate paperwork."

Elijah nods. "You can take a break in a moment. I have some more fun things to look at."

Nik finishes writing his name and hands his papers to Elijah as well. "I'm getting a hand cramp. I need a cigarette."

I roll my eyes and lean back in the plush conference chair, waiting. Elijah shuffles through the binder and pulls out five pieces of copy paper. "I've got some locations," he notes. I grin and lean forward along with Nik.

He places them in front of us and then begins with the first on the left. "This one is quiet, quaint. It's on a Dultun road, and so it's a bit secluded. The nearest business is a McDonalds."

I study the brick building and wrinkle my nose. I wouldn't complain because it's something, but it isn't it. Nik abruptly shakes his head. "No dice. I _hate _McDonalds." I snicker into my palm as he continues. "Next."

Elijah shakes his head with a chuckle and points to the next one. "It's more in the open. The only qualm is that a forest is nearby and-"

"No way," I say this time. "You know what forests have? Animals. I don't like animals."

He rolls his eyes and places the decent looking place on top of the other before showing the third. "It's on Darrow, so it has a lot of good places around it. A lot of start up businesses, like _Passion _and _BrainMatch_. No forests, no McDonalds."

Intrigued, I lean forward to look at the place. "Holy shit, it looks nice."

"Yeah," Nik agrees. It was all clean and pristine and perfect. It even had this weird garden thing going on in the front.

I meet Nik's eyes and we shrug. "It's really nice."

Elijah lights up. "I thought so. I'll put it in a separate pile. Next one has a forest, but-"

"No," I end firmly.

He sighs in exasperation and then pulls out the last one. "It used to be a dance studio. There's an apartment on top that could be used as an office. Not deserted, but not too populated either. It's perfect for a bar but it looks like shit."

The dirty word coming from Elijah's pure mouth makes me chuckle. "Lemme me be the judge of that."

I study it carefully and notice that it does indeed look like shit. Things are peeling, one wall looks a bit rusted, and there's not even a garden. One of the windows is smashed at the bottom and it just looked gross.

It was fucking perfect.

"Where is this place?" Nik asks, hovering over my shoulder. Elijah must see the expressions on our faces because he speaks slowly.

"Barthiew. Um," he wrings his hand out. "This place needs a lot of work."

"We know."

"And do you really want to invest in something so risky?"

I furrow my eyebrows and shrug. "Why the hell not?"

He sighs and grabs the paper from my hand. "I'll set up a date to go look at it and clear your head. We still have paper work to finish up."

I groan and grab my head. "Give me a tiny break, please."

Elijah rolls his eyes at me again and I take that as the affirmative. I lift myself from my chair and grab my bottle of water off of the table. Nik gives me a sour look and I shrug at him. "I need to make a call."

His look turns mildly amused. "You're so whipped." I don't bother answering him because the son of a bitch was just jealous.

When I'm outside the conference room door, I pull out my phone and smile at the missed call. Typing in a familiar set of numbers, my heart begins to race like it always does, but instantly calms when her soothing voice picks up.

"_Hello__?"_

"Hey, how's she doing?" I ask, thinking of my Mini. I missed her so much on days like these. She was so damn cute when she woke up in the morning. She had these little high pitched yawns that made me want to sit around and hang with her all day.

"Bad. She misses her daddy."

"Tell her I miss her, too."

"'I'll be sure to relay the message."

I kick a stone by my foot and then lean against the wall. "You know, she's not the only one I miss."

She laughs and snorts. "I didn't know you and Matt were so close."

I roll my eyes and then scoff. "By the way, when do I get to cash in on my date with you?"

She hums. _"_When do you have time, Mr. Businessman?"

"I've always got time for you."

"Oh hush," she chides playfully. "How's the meeting going?"

"Good, I think we found a location. It's on Barthiew. It used to be a dance studio."

A loud guffaw makes me cringe and I'm surprised it came from someone so small. "You mean that old shithole with a broken everything?"

"The very same," I say, not insulted in the least.

"My God," she murmurs wistfully, "You can do better than that."

"I could," I agree, "but I don't want to. Once you see it all dolled up, you'll be begging for me to take you while we're in the office."

She snorts one last time an berates me. "Now, this is where I hang up."

"Like you always do," I tease, "Always leaving me hanging, blue balled."

"Goodbye, Stefan."

"Goodbye. Oh, and Elena?"

"What?" She snaps flatly.

"I'll see you when I get home."

I hit the 'end' button and twirl my phone around in my hand for a little, whistling softly. I turn around to go back inside when I hear the familiar jingle of my phone again. A smile starts on my face again as I answer it again quickly.

"Couldn't get enough of me, could you?"

I hear his sinister smirk on the line as he lets out a dark chuckle. "No, I've had enough, believe me."

"Damon." I state blankly.

"The one and only," he teases lightly. He clears his throat and immediately turns serious. I roll my back against the brick wall behind me.

"How are you?" I try, mentally kicking myself in the ass. I'm still nice to him. Always nice to him.

He sighs. "I'm too pretty to be in jail, and some of these dicks think so, too."

I laugh hard at that and shake my head. "Do I want to know what you mean by that?"

He snickers. "I mean that you really shouldn't drop the soap."

We laugh silently for a few minutes and I soak in the glimpse of the past that I used to love and sometimes missed. My heart ached as I thought about the two boys in the huge house, one dark haired and one blonde, throwing eggs at the walls and getting into as much shit as possible.

I smile.

"I'm sorry," he surprises me by saying. "I...this whole thing has got me all tied up, and mom and dad don't even know, and I don't know what to say. I didn't rape her, Stefan. You believe me, don't you?"

"Of course," I utter softly, which was true. Damon just wouldn't. Ever.

He lets out a sigh of relief. "Good to know." He takes another staggering breath. "I need you to do me a favor, but...Hey, what are you doing right now?"

I look up at the building as I answer. "I'm at Elijah's office. Nik and I were eligible to take out a loan, so we're going to be starting up a bar together."

He whistles. "That's good news. And uh, your baby?"

"Nellie," I add.

"Yeah, Nellie. That's great. I'm really happy for you, Stefan, even if you don't believe that."

I swallowed away the part that didn't at all and nodded. "I'm happy, too."

He pauses and then continues slowly. "So...I heard you were seeing someone."

Fucking Bonnie.

"Yeah. Well, yeah." Very articulate, Stefan. Just fantastic. He laughs at my expense loudly into the phone.

"What's her name? What does she look like?" I could hear the teasing nature in his voice but shook my head. Good times were over, there were things to be done and I had no time for small talk and brother bonding.

"Elena. She's fucking beautiful and I'm probably going to marry her someday. Now, what's the favor you wanted?"

I hear him shuffle around for a moment before he whispers. "Alright, I need you to go talk to Andie."

Even though I don't need to, I whisper as well. "What the hell? For what reason?"

"I don't know," he drawls, "Bring her an apology cake and get her to tell the truth, alright?" He sighs and shuffles some more. "Look, I got a little into the drug business out of college through her. She's one sneaky bitch and she'll slit throats trying to make quick cash."

"So you're throwing me into the lions den?" I ask, still reeling over the fact that the asshole was in any way affiliated with drugs. "Since when did you get into drugs?"

"No. This is all a game to her. One big charade. I'll admit, I got into some hard drugs but I mostly just sold them, I promise. I don't have anything tracing me except her, and when I wanted out, she got pissed and went screaming rape. Thing is, I can't do anything in here. You have to help me Stefan."

I let out a gust of air and shook my head to myself. "This sounds dangerous, and with Nellie and-look, I want to help you. I do. But I know nothing about this chick."

He scoffs. "You'll be fine." He senses my hesitancy and continues elaborating. "You aren't the only one with the rebellious streak. I met her at a bar, and back then I didn't know about what she did to afford the hot dress she was donning. When she told me, it didn't even phase me, you know? Because I was a dumbass-"

"_Was__?_"

He ignores me. "And I wanted nothing but to get my dick wet. Do I care about her? A part of her. But she does anything she can to survive, and we can't let her get away with this.

Go find out some information and get close to her. She knows you hate me. Offer her money, whatever. Just fucking do something that makes her fess' up. I'm about .5 seconds away from become the jail bitch."

I chuckle dryly and nervously lift my cap from my head and then adjust it. "Can I think about it? I have Nellie to think about."

"Sure," he says, probably relieved that I even considered it. But hey, I'm still a nice guy. Depending on who you ask.

"And you might want to tell your parents. They have more influence than I do."

"Stefan, they're your parents, too," he says irritably. I ignore him. "Besides, I'll tell them when you tell them."

I glance at the door behind me and then at my watch. "Fuck. I need to get this shit done. I'll uh. Be in touch."

"See ya."

I hit "end" for the final time and wonder when I can go home to the only two people who make sense.

Elena paces in front of the TV, rudely blocking my view. "Could you move over just a hair?"

She scowls at me and throws her hands up dramatically. "Do you seriously think that I'm okay with all of this?"

I toss a Cheeto in my mouth. "Okay with what?"

"You going off to see some con woman who could very well be capable of killing you," she remarks, her eyes heavy with concern. "You need to call the police."

I drop the remote, giving up any hope of continuing to watch my show. "Look, the police aren't going to help him."

"And you should?" She walks closer and kneels in front of the couch, right between my legs. "Stefan, you need to think about this. How this could affect you, or Nellie or even us. I mean, you said you wanted us, right? But I'm not in the business of dating a man getting into something as risky as this."

My tone immediately softens. "I'm going to be okay, Gilbert. I'm stronger than Andie, she's like 5'1 and 130 on a bad day. Remember when I told you about my internal debt? I have to do this for him."

Her scowl deepens. "I hate him and I don't trust him. What kind of brother would ask you to do something like this?"

I shrug. "We aren't real brothers. I'm just going to talk to her, not start a war."

She licks her lips and bows her head, sounding so fucking sad and solemn. "Stefan please don't go. Promise me you won't go. I have a really bad feeling about this whole situation."

I watch as she crumbles a little in front of me and immediately pull her closer to me.

"Okay."

She peers up at me carefully. "Okay?"

I shrug again. "Yeah, okay." She smiles in relief and brings herself up to hug me.

"Would it be too inappropriate to grab your ass right now?" I laugh, pulling her tight.

I feel her laughing against my chest, but I can barely feel it through the guilt clouding my mind.

So this was what it was like to lie to someone you care about.


	9. Lies and Speaking

**Thank you for all the feedback. You guys are amazing!**

* * *

I've established countless times my awe at how well Elena had adjusted into Mini's life. I don't know, maybe it was a girl thing, but Elena really knew how to cater to Mini's needs instinctively.

Except when it came to clothing.

Elena liked for Nellie to wear these ridiculous hats and skirts and frills and I knew my Mini hated it. She'd always throw the things all over the room and she absolutely despised wearing shoes. It was actually quite hysterical to watch them interact.

"Fine," Elena humphed finally, after the last tennis shoe flew at her head. "You can go barefoot." Mini visibly brightened at the word and I reached my hand out to give her a high five. I almost thought she had it, but instead of slapping my hand, she grabbed it into her vice grip and brought my hands to her head. She clenches her jaw and shakes her body around so that her tiny ribbon in her hair falls out. I chuckle as Elena watches it flutter pitifully to the ground.

I watch as Elena moves fluidly toward the other end of the couch. "She's going to catch a cold because she won't put on her stupid sweater." I hide my grin with my hand and stare at the television screen to distract myself. Soon I feel the pressure of a pillow against the side of my head, which releases my smile.

"It's not funny, Stefan."

I roll over and look up at her. "She doesn't want to wear that sweater. So what? _I _wouldn't want to either." She looks away from me, _pretending _to be upset because, let's be honest, who could ever be angry at a face like this? I scoot up and reach out a hand for her.

"Come here."

She glares playfully at me before moving closer to me until she's planted firmly in my lap. I kiss her cheek softly as she lays back into me and I attempt to hold her close in the slightly awkward position.

"What time do you leave to meet Nik?"

I sigh as the deep stirring in my gut rears it's ugly head. I swallow it down and deepen my smile, rubbing her arm softly. "I should leave in the next fifteen minutes."

She sighs and leans in closer to me. "I preferred you courting me to actually dating."

I accept her admission and place a kiss on the back of her neck distractedly. She had curly hair naturally, so most times at the root you could see the wispy waves that decorated her neck. It was a small thing that you didn't notice if you weren't looking, but once you spotted them they were all you could see. Kind of like her tiny freckles I'd find scattered around her body.

"Actually," she pipes up, not bothering to wait for a response from me, "We haven't even gone on a date yet. So technically, this," she motions between us, "doesn't constitute as dating.

I frown and lay another kiss on her neck. "We'll go tonight." She looked dubiously at me. "After my meeting."

She looks pointedly at Nellie. "Sitter."

"Bonnie or something." She accepts my idea with a shrug and leans back further into me with a heavy sigh. "I promise we'll have a great time and you'll see how wrong you were to ignore your feelings for me."

She hits me playfully once, but that was all I needed to be in immense pain.

I relish the silence and simplicity of my stay with my two girls. The soft hum of the tv and Nellies soft snores are what makes me want to go back on everything I said I'd do. I almost do it, too. But I know I owe him and he reminds me of that when he calls me from his cell.

I don't pick up, instead, my eyes just roll across the screen to read his name. I regretfully stand, letting Elena settle into my spot. I look at Nellie who fell asleep with her fist tucked into her mouth.

I gingerly pull it out and kiss her forehead so not to wake her. Elena gives me a kiss too, and my guilt returns full fire. I feel like I'm having some torrid affair, and it makes me uneasy.

* * *

I park my car as far away from the complex as possible.

Now, I've never been a paranoid guy, per se, but I'm not stupid. I watch tv. I _know _what happens. I also know that no one needs to see me here for obvious reasons.

I walk the pavement as naturally as possible as I scan the folded slip of paper in my hand. The numbers are smeared from the day in my pocket, but I can still make out the address: 452.

The door is blue, but not the type of blue that's usually in or around houses. It's really bright, almost neon, and I knock with a nervous tap so I don't have to see it anymore.

I wait for a moment, but when no one answers, I lift my hand to knock harder.

There's a crash from inside, followed by the steady rhythm of footsteps on hardwood floors.

"The fuck is she doing in there?"

I hear a latch release from the top of the door and a thick aroma of cigarette smoke escapes the house as the fiery red head opens it.

She looked the same. I mean, I only saw her from one occasion with Damon, and I guess she looked as pristine as she did before, only with a dirty backdrop. She had red wavy hair that was frighteningly bright and gray green eyes with a fleck of gold. If Damon hadn't of touched her and if Elena and I weren't happening, I would definitely be in front of her for other reasons.

As pretty as she looked outwardly, inside there was a deep pit of black.

She studies me carefully before realization dawns and her pale hand reaches out to grasp the top of the door hurriedly.

"Wait!" I scramble out, putting my hand against the door. "I just want to talk to you."

Her fear melts away quickly at the tone of her voice and she places her left hand on her hip. "Bout' what?"

"My brother." She looks deeply into my eyes before nodding.

"You can come in."

The smoke smothers me as I walk in and I can't even fucking breathe. How the hell do people even live like this?

She takes me past the corridor to the island where her cigarette lays in a green broken ashtray. I take a seat on a highly uncomfortable stool that makes my ass ache but my feet dance with happiness.

"I'm surprised to see you here," she starts, startling me. She brings the cigarette to her lips and takes a drag before finishing. "You and Damon weren't close so I'm confused to as why you're trying to save his ass."

"I'm not." Her eyebrows fly up. "I'm here to understand a couple of things. Like why the fuck you're framing him."

Her lips purse and she tilts her head. "Did he tell you that?"

"Stop being cryptic," I taunt her, "It doesn't become you. Neither does innocence."

She shrugs and blows a puff of smoke from her nose expertly. "Believe what you want, Stefan. Did he ask you to come here?"

"Why does it matter?" I ask impatiently, stomping my foot against the foot of the stool.

"Oh, it matters," she says mischievously. She leans forward, a questioning look on her face. "See, if I'm so manipulative and conniving and capable of crying rape to get my fiancé sent to jail, why would your brother send you here?"

"To get you to confess," I argue, but I sound weak to my own ears. Fucking hell. She had a point, and Elena had said something similar before, too.

"I'm not confessing shit because I didn't do shit," she chirps obnoxiously. "I hate it when people-can you bring me that pack over there?" I slide the cigarettes over and lay my palm against the table. "I hate when people lie. It's my biggest pet peeve because see, I'm a bitch, ya know? I'm a real fucking bitch sometimes. My mind is crazy and my mouth can't even keep up and that's okay cause at least I'll tell you that. I own up to my faults."

"Everyone lies," I point out, my mind traveling to the white lie I told my baby girl and hot assed babysitter at home.

She looks at me like she expected my answer. "Uh huh." She runs her hand idly over the table top. "That's another thing: everyone tries to make it normal. It's not normal to lie and it isn't okay. But, you know, that's not even what I'm talking about. I'm talking about how Damon doesn't confess his wrongdoings and that's a shitty way to be, don't you think?"

I silently agreed with her and cursed myself for it. She points at the space in front of me. "Do you want something to drink?"

I shake my head stiffly. The last thing I wanted to do was drink tea with the fucking devil. "So you're saying he raped you?"

"No, I'm saying I didn't lie."

"No, fuck that," I respond to her confusing answer. "The way you're going about this shit is so wrong. If Damon pissed you off, I get it. But he's in jail, and you two were engaged. Don't you care just a little bit about what happens to him?"

She shrugs and leans back. "He's a big boy, Stefan. He can handle himself."

I sigh in frustration and drop my head in my hands.

"Just so you're prepared," she says quietly, "I'm not the only one who doesn't care about what happens to Damon, okay? Some people...some people want him _dead_. So maybe this whole jail thing will work out with him."

"This was a mistake," I blurt out, "I shouldn't even be here. I'm not getting mixed up in this backwards shit. I have my own priorities and my own life and my own girlfriend-well, kind of-and you and this situation make me miserable."

"Good," she asserts. "That's good because you shouldn't be here anyway."

Even though I knew the answer, I had to ask. "Are you going to drop the charges?"

"No. I'm not."

I stand from the stool and stretch my ass muscles because it hurt sitting down for that long and tried to stop myself from stretching completely. "You should be ashamed."

She shrugs again and points to the direction of the door. "Feel free to leave. I'm not begging you to stay."

"I was going to anyway," I say in annoyance, the adult part of me refusing to add a 'meanie' at the end.

I stomp out the room toward the door, and right as I open it, someone pops out from the other side. He has dark hair and dark eyes and looks indifferent toward my prescence. He walks in without giving me another look toward the kitchen I walked out of.

This place was really sketchy.

"I'm out of here," I mutter to myself, opening the ugly door. I breathe in the oxygen around me and take my time to my car.

It was a total bust, but at least I knew what kind of crazy was happening. Damon would just have to...he'd have to fend for himself. I want to help him, I do. But he's so fucking stupid for putting his dick anywhere near that chick in the first place.

I open my car door at the same time my phone rings. I answer quickly without seeing who it was.

"Lo?"

"Hey, are you supposed to be with me right now going over bar stuff?"

I halt at his words. "Fuck! Man, did Elena call you?"

He laughs at my anxiousness. "Yeah, but I covered you. Seriously, why the hell would you cheat on Elena? You can't get much better than that, my friend."

"Shut the fuck up, Nik. I'm not cheating on her. I had to take care of some things."

"And you decided not to tell her?"

"No," I say starting my car, "I did tell her and she got pissed because she says I was endangering myself so I lied about going."

"Well she's going to find out eventually."

"She might and then she'll apologize. She shouldn't be able to dictate where I can and can't go," I rant, trying to justify my actions. Which sucks, because either way I still fucked up.

"I'm gonna tell you what an old friend called the Internet told me: you can be wrong, or right alone."

I roll my eyes. "I don't have time for that shit."

"Seriously," he says, sobering up. "Sometimes you have to let the girl be right about stupid shit or you'll lose her over stupid shit. Stefan?"

"Hmm?"

"You lied to Elena about something stupid. Don't try and pin it on her, grovel."

* * *

"Hey, sweetheart. I missed you. Did you miss daddy?"

Mini reaches her hand out to grip my chin and I kiss her cheek greedily. "Huh? Did you miss daddy?"

She smiles her toothless smile at me and bounces around in her chair happily, her hands in tight fists. I don't know, but my kid is just the cutest kid in the whole world.

"It's fuc-pretty stupid how you have to teach your baby to speak words. Shouldn't they come with that sh-stuff programmed?"

"She's a baby, not a robot," Elena snorts. I bring her into my arms and hug her tightly to me, my hands gliding down to grip her ass.

"Hey, how was your day?"

"Tiring," she admits. "Nellie wore me out."

I turn to my smiling daughter. "Did you do this, Mini?"

She giggles and reaches her hand for her bottle of formula.

I kiss the top of Elena's forehead. "Is that code for not wanting to go out tonight?"

"I _want _to."

"Why don't you go take a nap in my bed, alright?" She was barely standing up and I didn't feel like dragging her everywhere tonight.

"I'll take a nap when I want to."

I smile at her stubborn nature.

"And just because I want to right now, doesn't mean that I agree with you."

"Okay, whatever you say."

She pushes off of me but before she leaves I bring her in for a kiss. "I'll be with you in a minute," I say against her lips. She smiles and kisses me again before taking off to my room.

I turn to Nellie and bring her up out of her chair and into my arms. "How about you? You tired?"

She doesn't respond and I don't expect her to. I kiss her cheek again and bring her closer. "I'm gonna be a much better daddy from now on, okay? I'm gonna start taking you more places. We can go to the park tomorrow, okay? How does that sound?"

She purses her lips and brings her thumb up near them. "I love you, Mini and I miss spending time with my number one girl. Don't tell Elena that though, okay? She'll kick my as-butt. Plus, I still have to get back at her for that pink hair thing, because just because we're dating, doesn't mean that I don't want the last win."

She stares blankly at me and I kiss her a final time. I stand with her, walking toward her room. I place her in her wooden crib, and handing her a stuffed toy in case she's bored. I flick off the light but turn on a night light near her that she's grown to love so much.

I was getting the hang of this dad thing.

As I head to the door to see if Elena was still up, I hear a tiny voice, like a bell, speak a little broken but clear.

"Daaaa..." Mini drawls in the darkness moving in her crib.

"Daa...eee."

I freeze as my heart begins to thunder in my chest.

"Daaaaadyy. Daa."

She fucking said it. She fucking-where's my video camera. "Elena!" I yell at the top of my lungs. "Oh shit. Elena!"

I flick the light on to see Mini peering at me from the frame of her crib with a contagious smile. "Elena, Mini said it! She fucking called me daddy! Here, Mini say it again." I pull out my phone and fumble around to get it to the video setting.

When the red dot appears, I motion for Mini to speak. "Daa?"

"Yeah, baby. Say it all. Say 'daddy'."

Mini looks at my phone curiously. "Daaaey?"

Close enough.

I shut off my phone and lift her into my arms to smother her with tiny kisses. "I love you I love you I love you."

She giggles and makes a fist to lay against my cheek. "You're so smart, Mini, so smart."

"Go to sleep and we'll try this tomorrow, okay?"

She bats her hand against me and then settles down in her crib once again. I give her one last kiss and flick off the light. "Goodnight, Mini."

I fly out the door and bust the door open to my room. "She said 'daddy'."

Elena was in a deep sleep, her body taking up more than half the bed. Soft snores erupted from her body that made me laugh a little as I undressed. She was sleeping on her stomach, and if it weren't for the rise and fall of her back, I'd think she was dead.

I crawl in beside her and wrap my right arm around her so she's nestled into my side, but she kicks me so it's not nearly as intimate as I'd like. I give her a bit of space, but instead reach my hand out to intertwine with hers. Just like that, we're connected.


	10. All The Parts

**For those of you who read Run With You, yes there are outtakes and future takes including the cabin scene that will be written shortly. Thank you for your patience!**

* * *

I toss a hand over my face as I groan, groggy and delirious. Once my mind has registered that I'm up, I immediately scan the beautiful woman beneath me, snuggled to my side . Funnily enough, my hands are placed comfortably, one on her breast and one on her plump ass.

I give it a squeeze to see if she responds, but she merely moans and snuggles further into me. Pity, I was hoping she was a sleep groper like myself. I roll over, detaching myself from her claws to grab my phone off the counter.

I scrolled past the missed call from Damon, as that was shit for another day. I had to be into work by 12, but it was 9. If I could get my girl up beside me, we may manage to have some fun for awhile.

I put my phone beside me and encase her back into my arms.

"Why are you up?" Her tiny groggy voice mumbles into my chest.

"Why _aren't _you up?" She points blindly to the clock beside her. I tuck a piece of hair behind her ear to see her better.

Like I've said, Elena was fucking pretty. Or beautiful or whatever. Most times you got those girls with nice asses and tits, but then messed up faces. She was fortunate enough to be pretty in every aspect of her. To be honest, I don't know how she was single before.

Maybe I'm biased.

"Aw, come on." I reach my hands down back to her ass. "We should be taking advantage of the fact that Mini is out like a light and we aren't at work."

She groans and pulls me tighter. "Morning sex, you're such a guy."

I rub the part of me that makes me, indeed, a guy. She squeals and I lay a slobbery kiss on her cheek. "Bet your ass I am."

She yawns away from me-probably to stop me from inhaling her morning breath-right as my phone rings from beside me. I lift it up and notice that it's Damon. Again.

I ignore it and toss it onto the floor.

"You aren't going to answer that?" Elena asks, pulling herself up from the bed. How the hell am I supposed to think about that when I finally realize what the hell she is wearing? Now, typically I'm never in bed long enough with women to know what they sleep in besides being naked.

But hell, she may as well be.

Those boy panties or whatever did not cover that delectable ass at all, which was not helping the current problem in my pants. And that tank top was ridden up like a goddamn bra(which she was not wearing) and fuck me if it didn't look amazing.

It usually takes a lot more touching than seeing to get me so turned on, but I guess that's life, right? Things change.

The saddest part of it all was that at least when she hated me a lot more, I could still jerk off thinking about her. But now Elena spends a lot of time here, and I can't just do it while she's watching. That'd be a really dickish move.

I've been celibate for the longest and she's keeping me this way until she gets an honest date out of me. What my girl wants, she gets.

"Stefan?"

"Huh?"

"Your phone," she motions to the device on the floor. I look down and think back.

"Oh, right. It was Bonnie. I think she's wondering when I'll be in, but Nik will tell her."

Why the hell did I lie? To keep her from finding out about the other lie. All this shit just keeps building up and when Elena finds out she's going to kill me, bring me back to life, then kill me again.

She accepts my answer and walks over to the bathroom adjacent to my room.

"Hey, Elena?"

"Hmm?" I hear the water start to pour from the sink.

"What do you think about going out tonight? Nik could babysit? Mini would like to murder him but I think we'd be good for a few hours. I know, I said yesterday, but I got caught up with Nik and you were tired so..." I slap my face when I realize I'm rambling.

She doesn't say anything.

"Elena?"

Nothing.

Suddenly, she pops out from the door, a toothbrush in her white filled mouth. She makes this weird noise and I almost think she's choking. But then she nods and does this head motion back into the bathroom. I think she's okay. Well, as okay as she always is.

I leap up out of bed and practically jog into the bathroom after her, yanking my toothbrush off the hook. I throw some paste onto it messily, the rest of it falling onto te counter. Elena frowns at the mess but continues to brush.

We brush in silence, occasionally bumping each other with our hips. She leaves the bathroom before I do, but when I'm satisfied with my cleansing I chase her back onto my bed.

"Alright, adult time now."

She giggles and pushes away from me, both hands on my chest. "No sex, buddy. Don't think just because I love your daughter that I'm gonna jump in bed with you."

"Fine," I acquiesce kissing down her neck. "But there has to be some way I can thank you. You know, for everything that you've done and all. It'd be the gentlemanly thing to do."

She laughs and moans, a deadly combination, while gripping my back tightly. "There's nothing gentlemanly about you, Mr. Salvatore."

I trail my kisses down further until I'm at her belly button, teasing the top of her panties and around the tiny crater. Everything about her was cute and soft; who in the world has an adorable belly button?

Her soft mewls of yearning make me smile against her. I lick a line from her belly button to the top of her panties, dragging my hand up to cup her pussy through the cotton.

She whimpers a bit, the sound going straight to my cock. When she starts wriggling beneath my ministrations, I know that's the okay to slip these damn things off of her. So I do.

Very seldom do I give oral sex to women. I just fucking don't, because it's a little disgusting and when I'm fucking a girl from the bar, the last thing I want is to put my mouth anywhere near her cooch. That being said, I am a man and I like women and I like seeing them aroused and a little fingering can go a long way so I never have to resort to that aspect of sex.

I like the feel of women, how they look and how they taste-on the outside.

Now, I know my cum doesn't taste like candy, but some girls smell and taste just as bad. The few times I have done it, something has always gone wrong, pertaining to their hygiene. Plus, it's too fucking intimate to me, I have to trust you a whole lot for that shit.

But when Elena pulls my hair and tells me to put my mouth on her? Well, I'm fucking whipped and she tastes good, like fucking berries and shit.

She's soft, too, and she moans and groans like a woman from my dreams. Her legs tighten around me and it makes me feel like a king. I'm usually a taker and not really a giver, but hearing and seeing and tasting her response to me makes me even harder for her, so much so that I start practically humping the bed.

I know she's getting close when I push my index finger into her and she starts clenching around me like crazy. She's tight and she's perfect and all I can think about is how good it'll be.

I double my efforts and hum against her so she's withering and making these high pitched moans all around my mouth. Finally, she falls off the edge, convulsing with tiny whimpers leaving her lips.

I lick her down from her orgasm, taking as much as I can for memory. I look up to see her smiling contentedly.

I move up her body to kiss her when my phone rings again. Fucking hell.

Elena leans over to get it and I immediately push her back onto the bed. "It's fine!" I say quickly, practically jumping on her.

"I told those assholes I'd be in later. We still have," I look at the clock,"three hours left. Three hours of anything we want."

I hear a familiar baby wail and groan, looking down at my erection.

_It's okay, buddy. Better days will come._

* * *

"I don't think Elena likes fish food."

Katherine rolls her eyes, tossing her lip gloss between her hands. "Why would you _think _that you dumb bastard?"

I recoil at her viciousness and squint my eyes at her. Nik guffaws from the corner, tossing a cheese ring to Matt. "Don't pay her any mind, pretty sure she's on the rag or somethin'."

Katherine looks at him and clenches her jaw before hissing at us. "You all are a bunch of pricks."

Nik leans back in his chair, looking pointedly at Matt. "Ya know, you should be tappin' that better, maybe she wouldn't be so pissed all the time."

I snort as Matt shrugs. "Like I said, I think she's on her period. She's been like this for like three weeks. Did you know that last weekend she made me sleep outside by the trash?"

Nik throws another cheese ring. "Periods don't last that long, dumbass. Either you fucked up or she's pregnant. Actually, either you fucked up or you fucked up."

Matt's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Kat's not _pregnant._" He stresses confidently.

"How would you know?"

"Because there's no baby!" Matt yelps as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. Nik looks at me solemnly before standing.

"I need a fucking cigarette."

I chuckle and push a forkful of pasta in my mouth. After a good five minutes of nothing, Matt calls my name.

"Yeah, man?"

"Do you think Kat is pregnant?"

"No fucking idea. I wasn't around for that, remember?"

He hums and then points to the paper beside me. "What's that?"

I slide it over to him. "I'm taking Elena out tonight, and Katherine gave me the menu to some place her friend owns."

He nods thoughtfully. "That's cool."

"Yeah, well, tonight has to be perfect for my girl. Who the hell knows where I'd be without her? She deserves a good first date."

"Did you buy her flowers?"

I pause and lift an eyebrow. "Am I supposed to?"

"It'd be nice," he shrugs. "Then again, cats are also nice."

"I don't understand, am I supposed to get her flowers or a fucking cat?"

He sighs as if he's really irritated with me and folds his arms across his chest. "You've been out of the dating game for a while, so I'll help you out a bit. Guys always talk about how complicated girls are, but it's actually pretty simple. They like gifts," he crosses of with his fingers, "they like guys to make effort to spend time with them, they like guys to tell them what they want to hear, which is the truth without being cruel, and they like to be equals in the relationship. That's the basics. Basically, you just gotta know what your girlfriend likes and you are in there. Literally."

I stare blankly at him. "How the hell do you even know this stuff?"

"Well, while you and Nik have been out getting pussy, I've been studying it."

I raise an eyebrow.

"No, seriously, I think I'm going to study gynecology in my second life."

A familiar ring brings me out of the conversation. Matt forces a handful of cheese rings down his throat. "Hey, your phone's ringing."

I sigh. "I know."

"Want me to get it?"

"No thanks man, but thanks for the advice."

His blue eyes light up like its Christmas. "No problem, dude. It's cool being the one to help you out for once."

I hold out my fist for him to tap and he does, eagerly, before I walk out the break room.

* * *

Tie or no tie? Tie.

Ties are really formal and it makes things seem like a big deal. Plus, this is my favorite tie ever.

I quickly tie it and straighten it out in the mirror. I bring out my comb from my pocket and brush through my hair a couple of times, pushing it in different directions until I'm mildly content.

I haven't been on a date since...well it's been a while. Even then I didn't care about anything. But yet here I am, holding a rose and wearing a suit like I'm on a reality tv dating show. My how the tables have turned.

I was actually pretty excited for our date. Nellie was a little peeved she couldn't come with us and even pulled the 'daddy' card on me. Not gonna lie, I almost caved. Since she's learned to say it, she's been ruthless.

But still so adorable.

"Leave before she realizes what a dick you are and stands you up," Nik yells from the living room. I grab my phone and stuff it into my pocket as I walk out.

"Don't say those fudging words around Mini."

He snorts. "_Fudging_?"

"Yeah."

"Elena put you up to this?"

I shake my head. "Nope, she doesn't even know I'm doing it. I feel like now if I accidentally fuck up, I don't have to face her judging face."

I lean over and kiss Mini's chubby cheek. "Sorry, baby. Daddy loves you, I'll be home later on, alright?"

"Daaa."

"I know, sweetheart, I know."

Mini takes her anger out on Nik by banging her rattle against his head, mercilessly. I laugh and grab my key and wallet. "Call me if anything happens. Like anything at all."

I head to Elena's apartment, half giddy and half nervous out of my mind. When I finally reach the door, I'm surprised I'm not completely in pieces.

I knock twice and then put the rose behind my back so she doesn't see it first. It was pretty teenager of me to do but I am pretty childish.

When she opens the door I feel my breath catch in my throat. No, like really I start coughing until my stomach hurts. She immediately comes to my side and starts pounding on my back, not fucking realizing I had a flower that she now pulverized to red bits and pieces.

"Oh, Stefan, I'm sorry!"

She reaches for the mangled rose and lies through her teeth. "It's beautiful. Let me just go put this in some..water?"

I cough once more and nod. She was wearing a beige colored form-fitting dress that went a little above her knee, and was strapless. That's all I know about dresses and all I can tell you other than that she looks amazing. I tell her so.

"You look great."

"You too. I didn't know you could clean up so well. I have to say I'm pleasantly surprised."

_Me too._

"Ready?"

She grabs her clutch and nods, cutting the light off. We walk out to my car, mostly talking about trivial things, but things I didn't even know about her. Luckily, the weather is nice tonight and she got away with not wearing a jacket.

"Your brother, he's younger, right?" I ask her, opening the car door for her.

"I can do that myself," she points out in an Elena-type fashion.

"I know, but humor me."

I hop into the driver's seat and immediately start the car.

"My brother is 3 years younger than I am. His name is Jeremy."

"That's cool-having a younger sibling, I mean."

She sighs. "It's a lot of responsibility. Don't get me wrong, my parents were great parents at points, but they didn't want a second child. They let the village raise him, so to speak. They wanted to travel, see the world, all that jazz. They weren't prepared for a second baby. I had to make sure he didn't end up in trouble."

"Did you?"

"Not really, no. He still hung around bad people and it was hard for him to have a male figure to model after, you know? He was a handful but I love him."

I chuckle. "You're so much nicer when you talk about him, or Nellie than when you're talking about me. Why?"

"You're just full of questions." I sideways glance at her. She smiles. "I think it's funny. The first time I saw you was when I was moving in and you were talking to Maria."

"Who?"

"Maria?"

"Who?"

"A blonde girl who lives two doors over from me," she says hesitantly.

"Ah. Maria."

She ignores me. "I remember being attracted to you, but you also had this very arrogant look to you. I don't like arrogance and so I didn't like you in the beginning, but you also proved to be different."

I furrow my eyebrows. "How so?"

"You're more good than you think, and you have a very vulnerable side that's very real. I like that part of you."

I smile softly. "Just that part?"

"All the parts of you."

"I like all the parts of you, too."

We were probably the most overdressed people there. At first it was funny, but people keep looking at us and I'm getting pissed.

"These people are shitwads. Hey, buddy, how about you pay attention to your own girlfriend, thanks!"

The scraggly teen pushed away from us after taking a long look at my girls breasts. Just rude.

"Calm down."

She reaches her hand across to grab mine and I pull it close to my chest. I feel a vibration and pull out my phone.

"Is it Nik?" Elena asks curiously.

"Uhh..." I hit ignore and shake my head. "Must be the wrong number."

The vibration begins again and I clench my jaw.

"I don't think people call the wrong number twice. Or all day."

My eyes flicker to hers and my breathing starts to labor. I ignore again and smile as if I didn't hear her.

"You said you're from North Carolina. Why move here?"

"I needed a change in scenery, you know?"

I nod thoughtfully. "And your best friend, Caroline, her too?"

My phone vibrates again and my heart sinks.

"Pick up the phone or I will, Stefan." She gives me a menacing glare as I stand to go outside.

I accept it and slam it to my ear. "I've had enough, okay? You've called me all fucking day and you aren't seeming to get the message: I have nothing to say or report, okay? So drop it."

I'm about to hang up when my mouth starts moving again. "Oh, and another thing: I lied to my girlfriend for you who already had mixed feelings about me, so that I could meet up with your ex fiancé slash bitch from hell only for her to basically brush me off and offer me juice. So next time you want to ask me something like that, don't."

"The bitch from hell is gone, Stefan. Andie's dead."


	11. Smartasses and Dumbasses

**I'm sorry this got out so late, and while I could easily list a few excuses, I'd rather we all just accept that I sometimes suck and cherish the days that I can update.**

The line goes silent at his whisper and I immediately tense up. A cold chill runs through me as my mind registers what he says.

"How the fuck..." I voice, running my hand across my jaw. "I mean I just...what the hell happened?"

He lets out an exasperated breath and pauses. "Asphyxiation, they're guessing."

I let out a laugh in disbelief. "Guessing? What about a fucking autopsy?"

"Don't get pissed at me," he reprimands, offended. "I'm just the messenger. Her friend found her body last night. Considering the police talked to me and not you, they probably don't know you were over there."

"Where are you?"

"With my lawyer. These pricks actually think I hired someone to do my dirty work-whatever. Look, I'm just warning you, keep your mouth shut about this shit."

"No, Damon," I hiss. "I had to learn the hard way that all these lies keep piling up and someone's going to drown in them."

He scoffs. "Fine. Lets say you _do _tell the cops. You know what will happen? They're gonna keep me locked up and press even more charges on me, and then they're going to charge you for murder and we'll be sharing a fucking jail cell together with Hank who likes men to bend over and be called Betsie."

"I didn't do anything," I attest, pacing around in a circle. "They have no proof."

He scoffs. "You were the last one to see her alive. They don't need any proof."

I shake my head. "Some guy was there after I left," I remember vaguely, my mind jumbled. My mind travels back to the suspecting guy that walked in when I left.

Damon clucks his tongue. "What'd he look like?"

I rack my brain. "Dark hair, dark eyes and gives off a really creepy feel. I booked it after he came in."

"Did he say anything?"

"No," I said firmly. "Barely knew I was there. He looked a little familiar, but I'd never seen him before."

"What was he wearing?"

I curl my fist and huff. "I don't know. Look, this shit is too twisted right now. I have a _baby _at home, Damon. I can't play these games anymore. I have to grow up and be accountable and shit."

He laughs darkly. "Well it's too late to play Good Samaritan now."

"I'm going to the police," I ignore him, kicking a stone on the cement in boredom.

"Fine, it's your death sentence."

He hangs up before I can get another word in, and I feel a little like a teenage girl the way I groan and yell into the empty parking lot.

A loud curse spits from my lips as I walk back toward the restaraunt. I refuse to let this trivial bullshit ruin my date with Elena. Even thinking her name makes me feel lighter. I can't fuck this up more than I already have, and I've done enough.

All this lying has gotten me nowhere but down and I'm sick of it. We aren't even technically in a relationship and I'm already screwing things up.

After a nice mental beat down, I head inside to see her staring off into space at the table. When I'm in her line of vision, she glares at me.

"I'm sorry. I feel like I'll be saying that to you a lot."

Her shoulders slack and a smile graces her lips. "You probably will. Everything okay?"

"They will be," I promise her.

She opens her mouth to ask for more information but I immediately stop her. "Not tonight, okay? Tonight, I just want to be with my almost girlfriend and get to know her because I really don't. I want to eat this fantastic lobster in peace and hold your hand over the table like normal people. Tomorrow, we can hash out all the dirty details, okay?"

She giggles at my seriousness and immediately picks up my hand. "Yes, sir."

"So change in scenery, right?" I say, picking up where we'd left off earlier. "Why stay?"

"I guess after awhile it began to feel more like home than NC did, you know?"

I nod even though truthfully, I did not know. I picked at my food some more to think of more questions.

"What about you?"

"What about me?" I ask, tossing a piece of lettuce in my mouth. She turns her lips up into a pretty smile and squeezes my hand.

"Tell me something about _you_."

"Well, you know I'm adopted, but I guess I never shared specifics."

She tilts her head and sneaks a straw through her lips. I take it as an invitation to continue.

"Damon was a pissed kid when he was younger, because my adoptive mother was unable to carry children to term after him. He wanted a sibling so badly and so they decided on adoption."

She smiles wistfully. "You would've thought you'd been closer."

I hide my grimace with my napkin and half shrug. "I guess."

"So, did they just bring you home to him?"

"No," I chuckle, "I wasn't a Christmas present. They took him along to the center I was placed at and, well, I was a bit more friendlier when I was a kid."

She lets out an adorable snort and rolls her eyes. "Well, I'd hope so."

" I see another kid my age walking around with this damn red cape on, and I think about how much I want the cape even though I'm not even sure I knew what it was back then," I reminisce with a soft smile.

" I run up behind him and yank it so hard he nearly falls on his ass, and he just looks at me, unties it, and hands it to me, smiling."

She smiles the whole time I tell the story, making smooth circles with the pad of her fingernail on my hand.

I lift my thumb and do the same to her.

"I always wanted to be an only child until my mom got pregnant. She brainwashed me and told me about how much I would love the 'peanut in her belly' and how much he'd love me. When Jeremy was born, everyone paid the most attention to him and I wanted to kill the brat. He couldn't even play because he was a baby so he was useless."

I cut her off with a grin. "Are you trying to admit to murdering your baby brother?"

The phrase sends a chill down my spine from hitting so close to the current situation, but I couldn't find it in me to care as she laughed.

"No, I got over it when mom gave me a lollipop and not him."

I shake my head in mock shame as a waiter pops over.

"Can I get you guys anything for desert?"

I glance down at the menu and up at her quickly. "I want chocolate mousse."

She licks her lips in a way that makes my pants tighten. "Let's share."

The waiter walks back toward the kitchen and my mind travels to my little girl who loved chocolate. I'd give her a bit of Bonnie's chocolate yogurt she'd leave over and Mini went nuts.

"What are you thinking about over there?"

"Mini," I say, twiddling my thumbs beneath the table.

"Why that nickname?"

"She's so little, you know? So I figure she's a Mini person."

She laughs. "What about when she's older?"

I frown. "She'll _always _be my Mini." I shake my thoughts of the punk on the motorcycle away and then playfully glare at the woman across from me. "You can't ask all the questions."

She sits back and folds her arms across her chest, her lips pursed into a smile. "Go for it."

I think hard for a minute before sighing in frustration. "Fine," I smile, "Just talk about you."

And she does.

Some things I don't know, like how she likes her coffee and how her favorite animal is a horse. She likes peanut butter and banana sandwiches and brings them in a lunchbox when she's at work. Her best friend, Caroline, has held the title for 15 years and is 'more wacky' than she is. Her little brother is allergic to nuts and she accidentally fed him a PayDay when she was 10. She likes to sing, but only Bruno Mars-nothing else. Other things I already knew, but I never told her. I liked the sound of her voice far too much.

When our mousse arrives, she practically tackles the thing all by herself. I felt a stirring in my stomach at how wildly comfortable we were with each other and how easy it was to spoon feed her the chocolatey goodness and vice versa.

When we finish, I contemplate licking the bowl.

"So good," I whisper at the remains. Elena sighs across from me, nodding her head solemnly.

"We should have each gotten our own."

I shake my head at the bowl again, lifting a finger in the air. "Check, please!"

We clear out our table and I grab her purse-which makes other people laugh but makes her give me a kiss-as we head out the door to the car.

"Where to next, lover boy?"

I stuff my hands into my pockets and lean out toward her. "I thought we could go for a walk."

She looks down at the heels that adorn her feet and raises an eyebrow. I shrug and open her car door.

"Take them off."

She does.

I'm a pretty simple guy and I never go too over the top for anything. I think Elena and I are in the point of our relationship where I can fully be myself and that includes not going whale watching for the second half of our date.

As I drive I try hard not to think about Damon's mess-emphasis on that dick's name because the shit that has been going on is not on me. Despite my efforts, Elena sees through me. She always does.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah."

More lies and more lies and more lies and more.

"So," she says, smoothing a piece of hair behind her ear, "Damon had good news?"

I turn to face her abruptly. "Huh?"

"I'm just going to go out on a limb here and assume that's who called."

"Oh. Yeah, no, everything's cool. Didn't we agree not to talk about this?"

She gives me her bitch face which means that I've obviously fucked up by saying anything like that to her, even though it wasn't meant to be rude at all.

"That was before you started acting all emo on me. But whatever, Stefan. Your business is your business."

"Hey," I start, "My business is our business."

"We aren't married," she laughs poking my side.

"That's why I flippin hate dating. It's like, I'm good enough to have sex with and buy shit for you, but I basically get no claim at all, you know?"

She laughs harder, "No, I don't."

"Okay, so when someone cheats on their boyfriend or girlfriend, everyone always says something about them not being married and that's supposed to make it okay. Kind of like those papers are the key to you having respect for someone else."

"Has someone ever done that to you?"

"Nah."

She reaches over and grabs my hand over the counsel. I don't say anything but I squeeze it tightly and bring it closer to me.

"Sounded close to home, that's all."

"Nik has been cheated on," I say, pulling up to the dock, "Not me."

We get out of the car and she immediately grabs a hold of my hand again.

"Nik? Really? He's so confident."

I click my tongue at her. "He used to be a total sap until some girl ruined his life. He never told me her name and sh-stuff, but she messed him up pretty bad."

"Sounds awful," she notes with a frown. She grabs her purse and slams it against my chest.

I yelp in pain as she points her finger at my chest. "You better not have used his vulnerability from that to encourage him to use women how he does."

I throw my hands up in defense. "Hey, he makes his own choices!"

She eyes me and then settles back into my side.

"So, tell me-"

"Hush."

"What?" I say, looking around our surroundings.

"You have that look on your face. That smirk that says you're going to say something that could make me hurt you."

I lean in and kiss her cheek soundly, just because I could. "Fine."

"I've noticed your lack of 'fucks' being thrown around. I have to say, I'm impressed."

I duck my head and shrug. "Yeah, I just figure I don't want Mini yelling it at me all the time, you know?"

She brings her long brown hair to the side, exposing the silky white of her neck. I'm so tempted to kiss it or fucking nibble it or something, but the last thing I want to do is lose my life tonight by touching her without asking her.

She smiles, her nose all crinkled up and adorable. I actually use that word to describe her a lot. Things that girls usually did that were annoying, were endearing for Elena.

"That'd be best. Alright, so you brought me to the middle of nowhere, are you going to eat me now?"

I raise an eyebrow and smirk. "Nice word choice there, Gilbert. I will, if you want, but that was not the original plan, no."

She flushes and hits my shoulder playfully. "I just wanted to talk, is all."

"About what?"

"I don't know, you choose."

She purses her lips to the side and then wraps her arms around my neck. I slide mine around her waist as she moves up to peck my lips.

"Why talk when we can do?"

I lunge at her, tongue and teeth all over.

"You don't have to tell me twice."

She gives just as much as she takes, pulling my hair and gliding her lips over my neck which, I admit, is a spot that always gets me going. And she had a mad case of roaming hands because they were everywhere, even cupping me.

"Wanna know something funny?" I ask mid kiss, running my hands across her ass. She hums and I squeeze.

"You have a birthmark a little bit above your tits and its shaped like a crescent moon."

She pulls back and glares at me. "Why are you talking?"

"I don't know, I thought it'd be nice to note."

I start kissing up her neck and she pants against mine. "I see how it is. When I want you I get slapped, but whenever you want me you just use me. Well I want romance! Cuddle with me after we have sex, tell me how beautiful I am!"

"Shut. Up." She says, running her hands over my stomach, but she's laughing and her tiny giggles make me laugh.

And laugh. And laugh.

Then we're on the sandy floor with her straddling me and peppering me with tiny kisses and big laughs telling me how beautiful I am and I've never felt so big and small at the same time. I kiss her back enthusiastically and keep my hands planted on the promised land. She ends up beside me, nestled into my arm.

If Mini were here, she'd be in my left armpit, and Elena would be on my right arm.

"I'm sleepy."

"I haven't even ravished you yet," I say, tickling her stomach a little.

She groans and pushes into me. "I've ravished you, though."

"True," I say lightly. "I have a feeling you'll always be wearing the pants in this relationship."

She snorts and then peers up at me with her large brown eyes. "Is that what we're in? A relationship?"

"No, I use you for your hamster."

She rolls her eyes at the same time I rest my forehead against hers. "Isn't it obvious?"

She bites down on her bottom lip, suppressing a grin. "I can be dense, too."

I scoff and shake my head before giving her a sweet kiss even though my heart is pounding. "As if its not obvious, I'd like you to be my girlfriend. Will you?"

"Ew, no. Boys are gross."

But her blinding smile was a thousand times yes. I lift her up with me and hold her like I hold Nellie.

"I'll show you gross."

"Show me gross what?"

I snicker. "You're an extra smartass today."

"I'm smart, and you're an ass," she points out. "We're a smartass together."

"How about I'm smart for liking your ass?"

"Screw you."

"Soon enough you can."

* * *

But it wasn't soon enough.

"Do you think you need to go to the emergency room?"

Nik holds a bag of frozen green beans to his jaw, groaning. "I don't want to, but it hurts."

I roll my eyes at his dramatics and mentally give Nellie a high five, who's perched on the love seat looking extremely proud of herself. I wink at her and she bounces in her seat.

Elena leans over and lifts the pack, wincing as she sees the bruising. "My friend Caroline is a nurse and can probably help inspect the damage better than I could."

She reaches out to text her and I kick his leg. "Is it dislocated?"

I guess there was too much humor in my tone because Elena launches Mini's assault weapon at my head and scowls at me.

"Thanks, Elena. Sometimes he's so insensitive."

I glare at him and bring Mini into my arms.

"Daa."

I smile. "Hey, sweetheart. I heard you did some damage today."

She giggles and hums. "Dada."

I give her a big messy kiss and hug her close to me, inhaling her sweet baby scent.

"I'm sorry you were hurt, Nik. I know that you didn't have to babysit for us," Elena gives me another pointed glance and I shrug.

"You also didn't have to try and feed her things she doesn't like. Plus, Elena showed her how to act like this, always throwing stuff at me and hitting me."

If I wasn't going to get laid tonight, I should at least get a couple laughs.

"I tried to read that dumb book you gave me but she got more fucking angry and lost her shit."

Mini stares at him blankly before looking up at me in annoyance. "Daaa," she complains.

"I know, sweetie. I hate him too."

"Caroline says she can check it out tomorrow. You can come by my house or something."

"Great," he groans.

Call me an asshole or whatever, but he's been here for at least an hour. If he were going to die, he'd be dead already.

"Come on, time for you to leave," I say to him, motioning toward the door.

"Stefan!" Elena yells, giving me a warning look.

"No, love, that's okay. Stefan's a bit of a dick but he's right. I'm tired."

She nods and helps him to the door. As if he even needed it. "Okay, we'll just keep the ice on it and if you feel it getting substantially worse, please call us."

Oh my god no.

"Elena, you heard the man. He's tired."

One of the qualities on the list Matt mentioned was spending time with your girl, so I don't understand why I'm in trouble for wanting to have some quality alone time with my girls.

I stand with Mini in my arms, blowing raspberries all over her cheek and neck. Her little giggles fill the air and immediately warms my body. I feel Elena join my side and hold her index finger out for Mini to take.

"Hi sweet girl," she whispers, bending her finger at her nose. "I missed you."

Mini closes her eyes an I kiss both her eyelids softly. "Time for little one to go to bed, huh?"

"She looks as tired as I feel," Elena mutters, stretching her body. I try not to pay attention to the way her chest juts out toward me.

"Meet you in bed?"

"Mmhm."

I kiss her cheek before we part ways. Once I'm sure she's tucked away in my bedroom, I start hyperventilating.

"Tonight was great, Mini, it really was. I just feel so guilty it's starting to gut me. I know I'll tell her tomorrow, but regardless I'm still a liar. A liar. That's a bad title that I've never ha before."

She coos and turns her head away from me.

"No, I'm not lying now. I have never lied to girlfriends before because I've never really had girlfriends but now I'm as good as Tiger Woods."

I scowl at the wall. "It just really sucks because I know some trust will be lost and she already didn't trust me in the beginning of all of this."

Mini yawns and garbles some nonsense so I figure it's about time for her to sleep. "Alright, baby. Catch some good Z's."

I place her in her crib and give her chubby cheek one last kiss.

I try to waste some time hanging out in the kitchen adjusting the heat and cleaning up some of the mess left over to clear my mind. Should I start by telling her I lied, or start by telling her Andie's dead?

I scratch my head, mulling it over as I cut the lights off all around the house. I extra double check that the door is locked and finally go toward the bedroom. Elena's curled up flipping through a magazine tiredly.

"I was waiting for you," she says cutely, placing the magazine on the nightstand.

I lean down kiss her and then stand up to undress. "Yeah? Hey, is that my shirt?"

She snorts and rolls onto her stomach, giving me a great view of her ass. "Not anymore."

I straddle her, not really sitting on her, and move her hair to the side so I can kiss her neck again. "Like finders keepers?"

"Mhm."

I slide my hands between her legs, cupping her. She squirms a little and I chuckle. "Look what I found. I guess this is mine then, right?"

"Yours," she swallows as I tease her opening.

I lean down to her ear and nibble slowly. "Are you tired?"

I move off of her and flip her over so she's flat on her back. She lifts her lean legs and pulls me flush to her. "Not anymore."

I kiss her lips, an action that makes me react the same way every time, lapping at her tongue with mine. Her little moans and encouraging hands coerce me to start unbuttoning my shirt off of her.

As my lips travel to her nipples, her hands grab the back of my head to keep me on her. I rock into her twice, blessing the sweet friction I got. Just underwear between us and I'd be there.

I groan in anticipation and lean back up to kiss her before she speaks.

"I'm so glad it's like this," she smiles happily, tangling her hand in my hair. I reach down to push a finger in her, making her moan loudly.

"Like what?"

She gasps in pleasure before adjusting her gaze on me. "Like there's nothing between us. I know I can trust you and I hope you can trust me. I'm just glad we're doing this the right way."

A pang of guilt stabs me in the chest and I roll over off the bed like I've been hit by a freight train. I keep my eyes closed and I can feel myself softening. I wasn't going to have sex with her like this, white lie or not.

"Are you okay?" She yelps from the bed. I open my eyes to see her hanging over me, her hair making a curtain around her face.

"I," I swallow thickly. "I think I'm more tired than I thought."

She looks down at her state of undress and then furrows her eyebrows. "Oh."

"Yeah." I stand, a bit wobbly, and plop back down on the bed.

"Do you want me to stay?" She asks, buttoning up my shirt. I instantly feel like even more of a prick and wrap my arms around her tightly.

"I'll always want you to stay."

**See you next time!**


End file.
